Chapter 7

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by dolanimg_

by dolanimg_

Grayson's POV:

It was then that I decided that I should reveal my story to her. Seeing her raw self in front of me made me feel ashamed if I didn't expose myself too.

This time I wrote the letter instead of sending something old.

While writing the letter a few tears slipped out and touched the paper dampening it as I wrote, I couldn't help it. Talking about my family was a risky situation which could either lead to me becoming even more depressed, sad or full of rage. My rage showed during the first month of her passing, it was a way of coping I told myself always saying that she was still alive. After the first month when I realised she was never coming back I became depressed, so depressed I pushed people away.

Another triggering part of my depression was when my dad left the house and all we had of him was the Final Goodbye letter. The day my dad left was a day I wouldn't forget.

Why may you ask?

That was the day Ethan screamed at me saying it was my fault but was it though...

I finished writing the letter and by the time I finished I was having an anxiety attack, I immediately rose out of my seat and went to my bed trying to find the hidden photo of my mum. If Ethan knew I had the one photo which supposedly got thrown away with the rest of my dad's garbage he would freak.

I just needed to let it all out, cry like there was no tomorrow. So I did.

I thought I was alone in the house so I started screaming trying to release the pain which had built up inside of me, I started slamming the pillows until I found the photo. Just by looking at that photo for a millisecond made me calm down and I continued to silently cry. I was facing away from the door and didn't hear it opening. It was only when I felt a weight on the right side of the bed that I knew Ethan was here.

I was silently waiting for him to scream at me or to push me and tell me to grow up but he didn't. The silence was killing so I turned around and screamed, "WHAT DO YO--". I stopped screaming when I turned around to find my twin with red puffy eyes as well, he was looking at my desk where I had my notes scattered around, more importantly, the letter.

"What is this Grayson." He whispered. I looked down afraid of answering him. "I SAID WHAT IS THIS!". I flinched at the sound of his anger, it just opened the door to more unhappy memories. He started walking towards me and I was shaking by the second.

I was expecting a punch in the face but instead, he hugged me. He hugged me and sobbed into my back.

"I'm not ok Grayson, I hated pushing you away but I needed to find my own way of escaping this madness." I dryly laughed, he looked up at me confused.

"Do you think I forgive you, don't you remember I'm just a stranger to you. Wasn't that what you said to me the night he left." Ethan looked down in guilt before spotting the photo in my hands. He snatched it off of me and looked at the picture before realising what it was.

He looked up at me in anger, "YOU KEPT THE PHOTO!".

"That was the only thing I had left! DO YOU KNOW WHAT GOT ME THROUGH EACH PANIC ATTACK AND ANXIETY ATTACK! THAT PHOTO! It wasn't you, it wasn't dad. It was a photo." He stared at me blankly before looking back at the picture.

"At least give me a copy, please." He barely whispered, I sighed before taking away the photo and keeping it somewhere that was safe. I turned around and found my door wide open and no Ethan in sight.

"Why does he do this to me." I spoke to myself before realising I had the letter that needed to be sent. I walked up to the desk before getting an idea.

I should go deliver the letter myself, see how Jesslyn lives and if anything know what she's feeling. I have the address and my bike so it should be good but I had to leave at midnight, a time where not a soul would be awake.

A few hours later I escaped the house and took my bike through the forest and passed the cemetery deciding to visit my mum after dropping the letter off. A turning road was up ahead and I made sure to steer away from drunk drivers which quite surprisingly happened every five minutes.

Thirty minutes later and I finally arrived, emotionally and physically exhausted. There I stood in front of her house, I stared at the exterior. It was filled with pastel colours, colours that I'm sure Jesslyn throws up at each time she exits and enters the house. She doesn't belong here I can just feel it.

I was too engrossed with the building that I saw a light flicker open in the house, I immediately hid behind a bush waiting for the person to go back to sleep. Instead, the figure walked outside and stood in the garden mumbling things to themselves.

I quietly made my way to the mailbox when the letter suddenly slipped out of my hands and made a silent yet loud enough thud sound for the figure to hear. I went back to my hiding spot when I saw them come close to the mailbox. The figure appearing was a girl who looked around 17 years old. She was wearing a hoodie even though it was 30 degrees making me realise that it was her.

She examined the mailbox before picking up the letter, once she read who the receiver was I saw a slight smile on her face before she disappeared inside.