Florida (accidentally) banned all computers and smart phones in internet cafes
The term “motor vehicle” was revised to exclude swamp buggies, deregulating the primary mode of transportation in the state.
Repealed It is illegal for a doctor to ask a patient whether they own a gun.
The state constitution allows for freedom of speech, a trial by jury, and pregnant pigs to not be confined in cages.
One may not commit any “unnatural acts” with another person.
Unmarried couples may not commit “lewd acts” and live together in the same residence.
Corrupting the public morals is defined as a nuisance, and is declared a misdemeanor offense.
Doors of all public buildings must open outwards.
It is illegal to sell your children.
You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the edges of more than four cups and/or saucers.
Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.
Oral sex is illegal.
A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
You may not kiss your wife’s breasts.
If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging.
It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
It is illegal to skateboard without a license.
Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
It is illegal to skateboard without a license.
When having sex, only the missionary position is legal.
Big Pine Key
It is illegal to molest a Key deer.
Broward County
Persons may not be “inappropriately attired” who work at hot dog stands.
Cape Coral
It is against the city ordinance to hang your clothes outside on a clothesline.
It it illegal to park a pick-up truck in your driveway or in front of your house on the street.
Cape Coral City
A $50 fine will be levied on anyone who allows a couch to sit in their carport.
Daytona Beach
The molestation of trash cans is banned.
Maintaining a car on your property which is no longer in use is prohibited.
Owning a flower pot with water in it that isn’t capable of draining is considered a public nuisance.
Destin
It is illegal for an owner of a store to allow another person to pass out free ducklings in front of the store.
Destin states that a cat that viciously chases passers-by is a ‘bad cat’.
If you wish to go swimming in the ocean, get dressed in your hotel room.
Torpedoes may not be set off in the city.
If you like to love to ride your bicycle in Destin, don’t lean it up against a tree in a cemetery.
It is illegal to drive over graves in a cemetery.
If you notice an ice-cream man attempting to sell his cold concoctions in a cemetery, call the police immediately, for that is illegal.
Hialeah
Ambling and strolling is a misdemeanor.
Key West
Chickens are considered a ‘protected species’.
Miami Beach
Skateboarding is not allowed at any police station.
Persons face up to thirty days in jail for selling oranges on the sidewalk.
Termite farms are not allowed within the city.
No one may bring a pig with them to the beach.
Naples
Neon signs are prohibited.
Palm Bay
Persons may not tow a sled behind their bicycles.
Pensacola
Citizens may not be caught downtown without at least 10 dollars on their person.
It is illegal to roll a barrel on any street, fines go up according to the contents of the barrel.
A women can be fined (only after death), for being electrocuted in a bath-tub because of using self-beautification utensils.
Sanford
Stage nudity is banned, with the exception of “bona fide” theatrical performances.
Sarasota
If you hit a pedestrian you are fined $78.
You may not catch crabs.
Satellite Beach
Beer may not be sold between 2 a.
Persons may not appear in public clothed in liquid latex.
Seaside
All houses much have white picket fences and full-width, two-story porches.
Tampa
Women may not expose their breasts while performing “topless dancing”.
Lap dances must be given at least six feet away from a patron.
