It is illegal to give beer to hospital patients.
Candy may not contain more than 1% of alcohol.
Shooting ranges may not set up targets that resemble human beings.
Children may smoke, but they may not purchase cigarettes.
At a wake, mourners may eat no more than three sandwiches.
Tomatoes may not be used in the production of clam chowder.
Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.
Quakers and witches are banned.
An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
Bullets may not be used as currency.
Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts.
Massachusetts liquor stores can only open on Sundays if they are in Berkshire, Essex, Franklin, Middlesex or Worcester counties and are within 10 miles of the Vermont or New Hampshire borders.
All men must carry a rifle to church on Sunday.
Alcoholic drink specials are illegal.
Hunting on Sundays is prohibited.
Public boxing matches are outlawed.
It is illegal to go to bed without first having a full bath.
A woman can not be on top in sexual activities.
No gorilla is allowed in the back seat of any car.
Tattooing and body piercing is illegal. (Repealed in 2000)
Boston
Women may not wear heels over 3 inches in length while on the common.
No one may take a bath without a prescription.
It is illegal for any citizen to own more than three dogs.
It is illegal to play the fiddle.
Two people may not kiss in front of a church.
No more than two baths may be taken within the confines of the city.
No one may cross the Boston Common without carrying a shotgun in case of bears.
Anyone may let their sheep and cows graze in the public gardens/commons at any time except Sundays.
It is illegal to eat peanuts in church.
An old law prohibits the taking of baths on Sunday.
Duels to the death permitted on the common on Sundays provided that the Governor is present.
Burlington
You may not walk around with a “drink”.
Cambridge
It costs $50 extra for a permit for hurling, soccer or Gaelic football games in a public park on a Sunday.
Concord
One may not sell or distribute bottled water in Concord, MA.
Hingham
You may not have colored lights on your house if it can be seen from Main Street.
If you live on Main Street and want to paint your house, the colors must be approved by the historical society.
Hopkinton
Though horses and cows are allowed on the common, dogs are prohibited.
Longmeadow
It is illegal for two men to carry a bathtub across the town green.
Marlborough
It is illegal to buy, sell or possess a squirt gun.
Silly string is illegal in the city limits.
One may not detonate a nuclear device in the city.
It is illegal for any citizen to own more than two dogs.
Milford
Peeping in the windows of automobiles is forbidden.
Nahant
Sleds may not be coasted down streets.
It is illegal to excavate any city street.
Newton
All families must be given a hog from the town’s mayor.
North Andover
An ordinance prohibits the use of space guns.
Woburn
In bars, it is actually illegal to “walk around” with a beer in your hand.
