It is against the law to have sex with a corpse in Illinois
Sex offenders in Illinois are prohibited from participating in holiday events like handing out candy at Halloween and Easter or dressing like Santa at Christmas, except under specific circumstances
Those under 21 can drink legally, but they must be enrolled in a culinary program to do so
It is illegal to hang “obstructions” form the rear view mirror, including fuzzy dice, air fresheners, GPS units, etc.
You may be arrested for vagrancy if you do not have at least one dollar bill on your person.
You must contact the police before entering the city in an automobile.
The English language is not to be spoken.
Carbondale
No one may stand on the sidewalk on the 500 block of Illinois Avenue. (Retracted)
Champaign
One may not pee in his neighbor’s mouth.
Chicago
Citizens can be hit with a $120 ticket for having an improperly displayed and outdated city sticker on their car.
All businesses entering into contracts with the city must sift through their records and report any business they had dealing with slaves during the era of slavery.
Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire.
It is illegal to give a dog whiskey.
It is forbidden to fish while sitting on a giraffe’s neck.
Kites may not be flown within the city limits.
In the Pullman area, it is illegal to drink beer out of a bucket while sitting on the curb.
It is legal to protest naked in front of city hall as long as you are under seventeen years of age and have legal permits.
Cicero
Humming on public streets is prohibited on Sundays.
Collinsville
It is illegal to wear sagging pants in Collinsville, IL.
Crete
It is considered an offense to attempt to have sex with one’s dog.
Cars may not be driven through the town.
Crystal Lake
If one wishes to plant new sod in his or her yard in the summer months, that person may not use the city’s water to water it.
Des Plaines
Wheelbarrows with For-Sale signs may not be chained to trees.
Evanston
Bowling is forbidden.
It is unlawful to change clothes in an automobile with the curtains drawn, except in case of fire.
Freeport
You must move your car back and forth everyday for 4 months out of the year regardless of weather conditions
Galesburg
No person may keep a smelly dog.
It is illegal to burn bird feathers.
Jostling others is illegal.
No bicyclist may practice “fancy riding” on any city street.
There is a $1,000 dollar fine for beating rats with baseball bats.
Horner
It is against the law to use a slingshot unless your are a law enforcement officer.
Joliet
Town fathers, reflecting the pet peeve of hearing their town’s name mispronounced ‘Jolly-ETTE’ when all local folk know it’s pronounced ‘Joe-lee-ETTE’, made pronouncing it Jolly-ette a misdemeanor, punishable by a $5 fine.
Kenilworth
A rooster must step back three hundred feet from any residence if he wishes to crow.
Kirkland
Bees are not allowed to fly over the village or through any of Kriland’s streets.
Moline
Ice skating at the Riverside pond during the months of June and August is prohibited.
There is a ban on unnecessary repetitive driving on 23rd Avenue.
Morton Grove
You may not own a handgun.
Normal
It is against the law to make faces at dogs.
Orland Park
No pool tables are allowed in a public establishment, because it supports gambling.
Ottawa
Spitting on the sidewalk is a criminal offense.
Park Ridge
Trucks may only park inside closed garages.
Peoria
Basketball hoops may not be instaled on a driveway.
Rock Island
Citizens are taxed because it rains on their property.
Zion
It is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, or any other domesticated animals.
