ME- so who was it, did you call me a slut be honest.
ME- you really weren't wrong.
ME- I mean I legit signed up for a SEXTING app. but I didn't think of it how those messages made me thing of it.
ME- I saw a relationship- now remember I'm a 22 year old virgin over here who hasn't had a real relationship and has the brain and imagination of an elementary school child...
ME- I ignored the fact that sexting women was your job- and forgot the part where you truly were just a random guy who I fell for without even hearing your voice or seeing your face.
ME- something in my delusional head was saying your were my- well, my boyfriend, that I knew you already. I don't know shit about you.
ME- and that's terrifying. I never learn.
ME- I'll never get it through my thick stubborn skull that you aren't mine. seeing you- I fell harder, not because you're some celebrity other girls gawk over and I'm dying to make them jealous but because you're actually beautiful.
ME- the most gorgeous man.
ME- getting those messages- I didn't even want to imagine your face, I broke a damn jar at work over you.
ME- the same job you made me do such wild and crazy things at. the same job that gave me the money to be able to have messaged you.
ME- I might be being dramatic. maybe you're telling the truth, maybe the messages sent on their own... but they weren't wrong.
ME- I'm not proceeding into whatever this is. it's not real, it's all a lie. I'm done sexting a stranger.
ME- I shouldn't of been chasing lust. maybe I should've went onto that tinder app, find an actual relationship. why I didn't do that beats me, at first I was going to joke around, then it was so much more in my head.
ME- I've wasted a few weeks of your life. I'm deeply sorry. I'm not a slut, I'm not going to slut it up anymore.
ME- bye joonie-ah.
YOU ARE READING
sexting a stranger • kim namjoon
Fanfiction"oh if you never would've texted me I never would've gotten this aroused." "if I never texted you I never would've known what being aroused was."