Chapter 17- I miss you
Someone's Point of View
Don't tell me why,
When I close my eyes, I see you,
Don't tell me boy,
You're smiling, we're both smiling,
Don't tell me why,
When I open my eyes, I'm crying,
Don't tell me boy,
We were together,
Iminulat ko ang aking mga mata at saka biglang tumulo ang aking mga luha.
"Yah! Come here!"
"Ayoko nga! Habulin mo muna ako." Sabi ko sa kanya sabay takbo.
Narinig ko ang pagtakbo nya kaya mas binilisan ko pa yung takbo ko.
"Huli ka." Nakayakap sya sa akin
"Ngayong nasaakin ka na, hindi ko na hahayaang makuha ka pa ng iba."
"I love you."
Naaalala ko ang mga masasayang araw na magkasama tayo. Naalala ko lahat-- ang mata mo , ang matangos mong ilong, at ang labi mong kay ganda ngumiti.
I woke up in the morning and turned on the tv,
I showered and got changed,
As I got ready to go out,
Today is the same as yesterday,
Nothing has changed,
But why...
I don't think I will be happy with my decision but I have to bare with it. It's my choice anyway. Hindi ko na alam kung tama pa ba ang mga ginagawa ko sa ngayon.
I look at the phone that suddenly rings,
And without knowing, tears fall,
Why are you doing this again?,
As if it's nothing,
You shake up my heart again,
Tinignan ko ang cellphone ko nang mag-ring ito bigla. Nadisappoint ako ng hindi ko nakita ang pangalan ng inaasahan kong tao na tumawag. Someone's calling... unknown number. I guess it's a prank call kaya hindi ko na sinagot pa ito.
I burst out in tears again.
Actually, I miss you so much,
I miss you,
I want to lean on your shoulder and cry,
I want to cry,
I'm smiling to try to hold it in,
I'm still shaking,
Please don't be good to me,
Don't be good to me anymore.
I miss you so damn much, and please don't be good to me. Sa tuwing pinapakita mong mabait ka parin saakin, hindi ko maiwasang ma-guilty. Nagu-guilty ako. Nahihirapan ako everytime na iniiwasan kita... Kahit gaano kita gustong lapitan at hawakan kailangan mong iwasan ako. It's better for the both of us. 'Wag mo na akong pahirapan pa. I can't hold it anymore-- please.
Don't be good to me, my heart aches,
Stop coming into my eyes, you keep spinning around me,
I'm weaker than I seem,
So I can't draw anyone but you,
I erase it then I draw you again,
You're so sweet again
So you drive me crazy,
You're so sweet again,
So you drive me crazy,
You're hurting me,
So you drive me even crazier,
Don't be good to me,
Don't show yourself to me.
Kahit anong pilit kong alisin ka sa isipan ko hindi ko kaya. Na kahit anong ipilit ko alam kong hindi ko naman magagawa. Bakit? Bakit hindi ka maalis-alis sa isip ko? Hirap na hirap na ako. Mas lalo lang akong nababaliw sa'yo.
Tinigil ko ang pinapatugtog ko dahil mas naiiyak lang ako. Tama ba? Tama ba ang ginawa kong desisyon na lumayo? May magandang dulot ba 'to sa amin pareho o mas lalo ko lang pinalala ang sitwasyon?
Nagsisisi ako pero hindi ko na maibabalik pa ang mga sinabi ko. Tapos na-- past na, ano pang magagawa ko? Humingi ako ng sorry? Gano'n nalang ba 'yon? Kalokohan.
Napuno ng mga 'sana' ang utak ko, na sana hindi ko nalang sinabi 'yun, sana nagpanggap akong walang nangyari, sana magkasama nalang ulit kami. Hanggang sana nalang ba ako?
Kahit ganon yung ginawa ko umaasa pa rin ako. Umaasang maaayos ang gusot na ginawa ko. Umaasang maiintindihan niya ang desisyon ko.
Ang hirap sa feeling na hanggang asa ka nalang-- yung walang kasiguraduhan kung anong kahahantungan."Bogo Shipda..."
A/N: Mygosh, I'm so sorry for the very late update.
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