STELLA SYNDROME. ✓

XV. crescent

XV.
c r e s c e n t

━━

JIMIN knew he should probably tell somebody. seokjin had just revealed the truth of how corrupted bangtan was as of recent earlier, and that had really torn his heart from his chest. seeing the other members around him staring in shame and fury at each other had further shattered it.

but a piece of him was reluctant. they already had so many problems to deal with, and he didn't want to make anyone else even more sad. the members' happiness meant more to him than his own struggles, and he sure as hell wanted to get their spirits up before he unloaded on them his secret.

the stars were only another reminder of how tragic their lives were becoming. however, not only did he had extreme respect for what jungkook went through, he now understood his pain. and so he had to bottle this secret and toss it out so no one could know. sure, he was going to tell them in time, but with everything that was happening anyway, he didn't want to distract anyone from what was really important.

now, he was beginning to reconsider. especially since he saw jungkook crash into the bathroom late that afternoon, lips glowing bright gold. that was enough to keep him awake the rest of the night.

this is a pretty tragic story, he admitted to himself. what once was just a story about two people finding each other had now exploded into something far worse than a love triangle—a love quartet. a beautiful, sad love quartet singing symphonies of misery and chaos.

yeah, they were screwed.

━━

JEON jungkook was not in a good mood to say the least.

all of these emotions were swimming around in his head, only growing as he thought more and more about what had happened in recent events. before, all he could think about was how mad he was at yoongi and taehyung for destroying everything he thought was great in his life. but after cooling down a bit, he realized how hard it was to keep in their feelings; since he knew exactly how they felt. yoongi and taehyung couldn't help it.

he paced his room, a trembling hand running through his hair. the brunette was scared. scared for jimin, who was dealing with this alone right now, just as he was. scared for taehyung, for feeling something he knew he shouldn't but feeling it nonetheless. for yoongi, for how jumbled and out of his element he was. for seokjin and namjoon and hoseok, who had to watch it all unfurl.

and scared for himself, since the stars had burnt his lips and throat once again last night.

he'd gone back into the nightmare that plagued his dreams. and jungkook could not keep it a secret again for much longer.

"alright," he announced, swinging his door open hard enough to make it smack the wall. he didn't care if it woke anyone up, because that was his exact point. he was done with secrets and lies, with hurting and crying. he missed his friends. he missed how it used to be. "i have something to say, and i sure as hell am not going to keep it inside anymore."

jimin was the first to emerge from his room, and the brunette witnessed it with a twinge of sadness. he'd spent the night alone for the first time in a month, and he longed for cuddling with the blonde and kissing his forehead as they both drifted into sleep. behind him was hoseok, who looked just as exhausted as they were. next was yoongi and seokjin, who seemed to have reached a truce but the former was still receiving a disappointed shake of his head from the latter. the other members followed closely after, rubbing their eyes blearily. it was 6:30 in the morning, after all.

he turned quickly to seokjin, brown eyes blazing with determination. "you said you don't want anymore secrets? fine, here you go."

he threw open the door to his room and headed to his bed, raising the slip beneath the mattress to reveal a bag, stretched wide to hold what was inside. he grabbed it and with a sharp tug, emptied the bag's contents on the floor.

a hundred or so glowing stars twinkled around their feet. seokjin raised a hand to his mouth, and namjoon looked at jungkook, expecting an explanation. the brunette stared at each one of them in the eye, heart breaking when he saw the terrified expression washed over jimin's face. "i never stopped," he said quietly, gesturing to the stars. "when i got back from the hospital, the stars came back. all of those days you thought i was getting better, i was getting worse."

"but how—" yoongi whispered, face paler than it normally was.

"i still have it," jungkook murmured, "i still have the stella syndrome."

jimin swallowed and blinked away tears. jungkook had been hiding that from him? how easy it was to lie to the ones you loved, it seemed, for he would have done the same thing. "i-i..." everyone turned to looked at the blonde, who bit his lip. "...i have it too."

yoongi inhaled through his nose, heartbeat ringing in his ears. he did this. he was hurting jimin. now, he finally understood why jungkook had lied to them for so long about his condition and let himself wither away. not only did he not want to be tested, he also didn't want to hurt his friends.

namjoon just shook his head tiredly before opening his eyes, sunken with worry. "no more secrets. no more lies. who else has it?" no one raised their hands. the leader sighed in relief before the worry lines returned to his forehead. "does... does anyone else have hanahaki? speak up."

slowly, jung hoseok lifted a trembling hand as a single black flower petal fluttered to the floor.

this book is almost done.
i still don't even know how
i'm going to end it.............