Liberty Star

Foster Home: With the Shaws'

Since I'm not allowed to be on my own and I'm not allowed to be with my siblings till the trial is over I am being forced to live with a foster family. I guess it could be worse, but they were super nice the first night and have been allowing me to have my space and time on my own. I have been trying to hard not to interfere with their life and keeping myself up in the room they let me use for the time. When I walkbin the back door, Mrs. Shaw is busy around the kitchen fixing supper.

"Would you like something to eat dear?" Mrs. Shaw asks with such a sweet calming voice.

"Sure." I sit down at the dining table. I try to smile, I really do, but it is so hard when you feel like your whole world that you knew was gone and I may never get any of it back.

Mrs. Shaw sets a plate in front of me and then pats me on the shoulder, "It's going to be all right dear, everything will work out in the end, it always does."

"I just don't know." I swirl my noodles around with my fork before taking a bite. I will have to admit that Mrs. Shaw was one amazing cook ever. I have never tasted food so freaking good like this, she should really open up her own restaurant. I look over at her then and attempt to smile, but the tears start to wail up in my eyes, "I really miss my family. I just need to know if they are alright you know."

"I can try to check in on them for you if you like."

"Thanks Mrs. Shaw, I would really appreciate that." I finish the rest of the spaghetti and then get up to take the plate to the sink. I rinse it off and place it in the dishwasher to be washed when ready. She doesn't have to ask me to, I do it on my own, probably just on instinct due to Jackson. We had to make sure the house was spotless before we could even go to our room.

Mrs. Shaw rubs my back again, "I would have gotten that dear, but thank you so much for helping."

I really didn't know what to say to her so I just shrug my shoulders and walk out and then head to the bedroom; the room that they had given me for the time being.

The Shaws are super nice and all but I know when this crap is over they will not accept all of us. I know this is just for the time being while trying to figure out what to do with me. And since the murder involves the four of us, we are being forced to be separated, I guess so we can't talk about the trial and all.

Mrs. Shaw is in her forties. I did find out that she has always wanted children of her own but unfortunately she was not able to, so her and Mr. Shaw decided to take kids in that needed help. Even though they are not able to have children, they would both make awesome parents. Mrs. Shaw is nothing like my momma. She is a little over weight, which is fine because she looks so healthy and is healthy. She has that kind of body and vibe that one could just snuggle up against and dose right off to sleep. Mrs. Shaw has dark hair with several grey strands and she wears these bright blue glasses and most of the time she has on an apron. I guess cause it always seems that she is cooking something and that something is food, not the things I had seen momma cooking up at times.

Now Mr. Shaw, is five years older than her and he is a cop, yes a cop. Although in the house one would never have known because I assume cops are usually super strict and all but he is so easy going. Yes he went over the rules when I arrived, but I won't break any of the them. Why because I have no reason to. He is also built and I mean built, he likes to work out and goes running and hiking on a daily bases. He has asked me to go already on a run but I kindly turned him down and told him I would try to go another day, besides I don't have any running shoes. He said that they would have to take me shopping. Maybe we will go this weekend. Now I usually don't take handouts and I tried to explain that but they both said as long as I am here, I am part of the family and all members in this house is treated the same no questions or butts about it. So guess we may be going shopping.

This room that I'm in is so big; it's almost as big as two of our rooms back home. The walls are painted a light mint bluish-green. Mrs. Shaw said there have been several other girls in this room in the past. On the far wall, were pictures of all the girls. She claimed every single one. She said many she had helped taken care of them, some for a little while, others longer. She showed me the three that she actually adopted. The rest were here and then gone. Some went back home, some moved in with family members or got adopted by other foster families. On the opposite wall, there were paintings and drawings and even some poems. Some had self portraits, some hand flowers, rainbows, hearts and stick figure families holding hands. She explained that anyone that stays here, makes her a picture or poem with their name, so that she can remember them years to come.

The Shaws also kept boys and had a different room for them. She didn't take me in there, but I assume the walls are a different color and there is a wall with pictures of the boys and drawings as well. I had a pretty good feeling that they had kept many children in their home over the years.

I am the only girl at the moment which is fine with me, because I really don't feel like having to share the room and have someone else in my space. I just need time to think. I hear though that there is a boy living here at the moment he rarely comes out of his room. I did catch a glimpse of him the night before. He was a little taller than me, so I assume he is around my age. I didn't get to get a good look at him though. He had came out of the bathroom and then right back to his room, he didn't even notice that I was there. I did notice the hair though and it was a very rich black, almost looked like he had dyed it and I'm pretty sure that it is. I wished that he had looked up but nope, no such luck. Mrs. Shaw said his name was Hayden and not to bother him because he is super shy.

Tonight before going to bed, I had to go to the bathroom. I went to open the bathroom door and he was coming out of the bathroom and since he was not paying any attention he slammed right into me. And that's when we made eye contact. Now I have seen several cute boys like at school and all but this boy damn he looked so so freaking cute. He looked at me and I just couldn't stop staring into his eyes. They were so freaking clear, the bluest eyes I have ever seen in my life and it was like I was being hypnotized.

He broke my concentration. "Sorry," he mumbled.

"I-I-I'm sorry, I should have knocked first," I reply.

He stared back at me for a split second and without another word he went around me. I was lost for words. Before he got to the bedroom door I blurt out, "I'm Star by the way."

He repeated my name back to me, "Star." He nods his head and throws out his hand like a quick wave and shuts the door.

I go on back to the bathroom and after washing up I brush my teeth then head back to the bedroom. As I am walking, I hear a noise coming from the boys room. I wasn't gonna knock, but my heart said (knock-just do it go on knock you can do it) and my brain was saying (no leave him be, no go on to bed he doesn't want to talk to you.) I contemplate for a while and then got the courage to do it and so I knock. suddenly it gets super quite on the other side and then I hear footsteps and then the door knob unlocking, and there he is looking back at me again.

"Hi, sorry about earlier," I say in almost a whisper. I look past him, trying so hard not to look up into his eye. I notice on the far wall that there are pictures hanging up of boys. I'm pretty sure those are all the boys that the Shaw's have helped out. The walls were painted an ocean blue color. OK so I wasn't trying to be nosey, I was just trying to get my mind occupied so I wouldn't see his eyes.

"Look it's no big deal, it happens. I'm sure as long as you are here it's going to happen again." He starts to shut the door but something stops him. "Hey, you all right?"

And that's when I look over, my goodness those eyes, sparkling crystal blue eyes. I try to look away again but it was so damn hard it was like I was in a trance. He stared back at me waiting for me to answer. I finally stutter out, "I'll be ok." I just happen to see it then, the scar that ran down the side of his neck. Maybe this is why he has the long hair to help cover it up.

I quickly look away and he says, "Well good night then." And he closes the door.

So I go back to my room. I have such a difficult time sleeping, tossing and turning and my mind just won't shut off. If I wasn't thinking of the trial, my brothers and Dawn, I was thinking of Hayden.