Liberty Star

On the Stand:

"Star, we are waiting for you to answer the question?" the lady asks again while tapping her foot on the floor.

"Oh! Sorry, I was just thinking." I try to snap out of thought.

"Thinking about what?"

"My mother," I whisper.

"Would you like to start with her then, is she the reason Jackson Miller was murdered?"

"I don't know." I say rather rudely.

"So you murdered him, but it wasn't because of your mother?"

"I didn't murder anyone!" I yell at her.

" Then can you tell us who did. Who killed Jackson Miller?"

"I told you, I don't know."

Our lawyer stands up then, he was arranged by the state to help us out. He is super tall and skinny and today he is wearing a black suit that makes him look even talker. Mr. Dawson grunts and then requests, "Your honor, may we take a short recess."

"Granted," Judge Taylor replies, taking his gavel and hitting his desk twice. "Take a fifteen minute recess." He stands up and leaves from a door in the back of the room.

Our lawyer motions for me to come over to him and then we walk out and down the hall to another room.

"Star you have got to calm down; you need to relax up there."

His name was Dawson. Now Mr. Dawson was like in his early thirties, wasn't married and had no kids. But he seemed to be a pretty nice guy even at ti n.v es I thought he was against us as well. He always has his hair perfectly combed back and I don't think I have ever seen it out of place.

Oh! I forgot like I don't have like fifty something people freaking staring at me as if I'm the most messed up, whack-o girl in the world who is being accused of a freaking murder. Well that's what I wanted to say but instead I just say, "Sorry."

He hands me a coke and I reluctantly take a sip. Once the ice cold liquid goes down I tell him, "You know it would be easier if you just asked the questions."

He looks down at me, as if almost feeling sorry for me and says, "Well Star, I told you she gets to go first. When she is done, I will then ask you alright."

I take another sip of the coke. "I just want this to be over with and I want to be with Storm, River and Dawn. I can't stand being away from them and they need me."

"You know the rules; I told you when this is all over you guys will see each other."

What a freaking joke. I knew better than that because when this is all over so will we. I know I've seen it on the movies, heard kids at school talk about foster homes and how they will separate brothers and sisters. I knew and I didn't want to believe that we would never be together again.

I finish off the can of coke, tossing it into the garbage bin and then the two of us walk back down the hall and into the court room. I take a seat back by the judge. I hate looking up because I see it in all their eyes already; they all think I did it.

The pretty snobby lawyer stands back up and walks up really close to me. "So Star, where were we?" she pauses for a second, waiting on me to respond. When I don't she says, "Can you please tell the jury about Jackson? Like how did you know him?"

"He was my mother's so to speak boyfriend, I guess you could say" I answer the stupid question. She knows who he was; I don't know why she wants me to tell her. I try not to think about my trembling hands, placing then under my legs to sit on them to stop the movement. I so did not want to talk about him. I wanted everything about him in my memory to be shredded to pieces so he would never come into my thoughts ever again.

"Where was your father?"

"I don't know." I then thought of him, looking around at all the people sitting in the audience. I had hoped that he would have heard about the trial, hoped that he would have been there but of course he was nowhere to be seen.

"My father left when I was eleven."

"So he has been gone. Have you seen him at all in the last four years?"

"No, however he will send us Christmas cards, birthday cards with money. Or he was doing that until he found out that she was seeing someone else."

"Then what happened?"

"About two years ago he stopped. He stopped sending cards, stopped sending money." I suddenly felt like I was going to start crying. I could feel the lump rise in my throat and my eyes were starting to sting from the tears that I was trying to hold back. This was not the time; I kept telling myself over and over in my head.

"So when Jackson came into your life, I assume you hated him. Maybe felt like he was taking your fathers place therefore you killed him, got rid of him."

"OBJECTION!" Mr.Dawson yells.

She shoots him a glare and then looks back at me. "Sorry, did you like Jackson?"

"At first, I guess I did a little. I mean my mom seemed to be happy again but that only lasted like two months and then she was back to her same old self but this time was worse."

"Her old self?" She looks at me and then to a woman sitting in the crowd. "Is your mother here today?"

That woman in the crowd, she looks at me and attempts to smile as if I am that four year old little girl who missed her so much. Yet her eyes don't sparkle like they use to; nope that was not my momma.

"Star!" she snaps at me, the lawyer that is. "Is your mother in the courtroom today?"

"Yes!" I pause long enough to stare at my mother to just to get her to freaking notice me and then I say, "no."

"Well which is it, yes or no, can you or can you not determine if she is here or not."

"That woman, she looks like my mother alright but on the inside she is not my momma. I lost my momma way before I lost my father."

Now all of a sudden it felt like everyone in that court room stops what they are doing and all eyes are on me. The crazy girl, the girl who can't identify her own mother and who is being accused of cold hearted murder, yep that girl. The funny thing is, I don't really mind these people staring at me it's not like I haven't had people stare at me my whole life.

"You lost me, can you please explain."