Spoken Words

The Breakup

  It's not the breakup that hurts the most. It's the post trauma that follows it. It is waking up and checking your phone for the messages that isn't there. It's like starting your life over again and you have no idea where to begin.   

  I'm just gonna have to accept the fact that I'm gonna get sad every night, no matter how my day went. Days have passed and you are still my only thought.

  I've lost many things, many people. I can't afford to lose anymore. Ever want to cry, but your eyes have run dry years ago? So you just sit there in silence, staring into empty space, and seem so absent, as each horrible moment you face.

  Sometimes we just say " I just want you to be happy", but deep inside our hearts we know, we still want to be their happiness. I'm tired of falling for people who don't want to catch me.

  Real feelings don't just "Go away" cause I break down every time I remember your smile and I cry alone at night when you're not by my side, cause your heat's gone and now the house is cold. So I just pray that wherever you are, it's all flowers and gold. You don't know how much you hurt me with the fact that I will never be enough for you.

  I pretend that my depression has gotten better just so my friends don't worry anymore. It sucks when you know you need to let go but you can't because you're still waiting for the impossible to happen. Life is short, but it feels long when you're alone..