Pride and Pretenses. (Dramione)

Chapter 21

Damn it!
Draco threw the first thing he touched at the wall. The mug shattered into pieces. Draco didn't bother repairing it with his wand.
With a frustrated sigh, he sat down heavily on the couch. She was gone. He couldn't believe she actually left without saying goodbye. He supposed their earlier argument had something to do with it but damn it, he deserved more than that! He fucking saved her life! He deserved better than a slap in the face! Didn't he?!
Draco ran his fingers through his hair.
Of course, it was only him. She found time to say goodbye to her precious Gryffindor buddies. He heard Longbottom invite Loony Lovegood for an impromptu farewell party in Gryffindor Tower. Of course, he wasn't invited. Not that he would've wanted to go anyway. She can have her stupid Gryffindor friends. However, the overhead invite did confirm her departure. He was surprised by that. He honestly thought that she would accept Potter's help. And he would bet the whole Malfoy fortune that Potter definitely offered to pay so she can stay. But that was her, he supposed: too proud to accept anyone's help. He gave a dry laugh as he remembered the night she jumped. Her whole life had literally fallen apart and still, she asked him to drop her.
Draco felt a sharp pain as he remembered what she looked like that night.
But for all her stubbornness, at least she didn't drag Sophie into their mess. As only she could do, she somehow found a way to say goodbye to Sophie without him knowing. He was surprised to find Sophie upset when he came in after dinner to put her to bed. Sophie told him that Hermione visited to say goodbye earlier.
"She said she was leaving because she had to change schools," Sophie said, nearing tears. "I asked her 'Why? You don't like us anymore?' and she said that she loved me very much but sometimes people have to do things they don't want to do. I told her she can come hide here with me and you would take care of us but she just gave me a hug and said that it wasn't possible." Sophie looked at Draco. "Why couldn't she stay? You can take care of her too right?"
"She wouldn't let me."
Draco threw something else at the wall. Merlin! Why did she have to be so damn proud?! He would've done anything for her – anything, if it meant that she could stay. But even as he stayed up all night in Sophie's room, watching the door, willing for her to come through it, agonizing over the last words he said to her, he couldn't do it. He couldn't make himself march to Gryffindor Tower and demand to see her one last time. He was too scared. He was too proud. And now she was gone. He always knew their pride would ruin them.
oOoOoOoOo
Hermione felt miserable. Miserable was an understatement. Wretched, crushed, desolate, devastated, sad. No words could describe how she was feeling. Walking away from Hogwarts that morning felt like ripping herself in half and leaving the live part behind. Now she was a walking zombie. She went through the motions but for all intents and purposes she was dead inside. She felt that way once before – when Cedric died. She wasn't sure she could survive another round.
Her friends tried their best. They all did. True to their word, they sent her letters everyday, letting her know what was going on. For her part, she answered them faithfully, telling them she missed them and how her studies were doing. But they all, Hermione included, knew it wasn't the same. They all wondered, though no one dared voice it, how long it would last. How long before they all moved on with their lives. Hermione refused to think about it. She refused to dwell on the life she left behind. She didn't know if she could handle it without going insane. Although, an insane daughter is probably what her parents deserve. Nonetheless, she decided to just put all her energy into her studies. If she concentrated on her books hard enough, nothing else existed – not her parents, not the pressure, not her friends, not the life she left behind. Her tutor was actually quite impressed with how fast she was progressing. The old Hermione would've been happy to know that. The new Hermione liked that it shut her parents up for a bit.
At night it was a different story. With no books to distract her, Hermione had way too much time to think. She would take her wand out from under her pillow and absentmindedly cast spells around her room. Using her magic felt like a breath of fresh air after a long day in a stuffy room. Her mother actually had the gall to demand that Hermione surrender her wand. Luckily, Hermione thought far enough ahead to ask Fred and George to make a counterfeit replica for her. As always, they delivered and presented her with the fake wand during the Gryffindor farewell party they snuck into. So she was able to keep her wand in her room, casting glamour charms on it in the morning so that her parents wouldn't see it even if they were staring right at it.
One person who never wrote to her was Draco. Hermione couldn't summon enough courage to write him a letter herself even though she missed him so much. It hurt to think of the last time she saw him. She knew she was wrong for freaking out at him but can he really blame her when she was clearly experiencing something traumatic? Humility was never their strong point and she didn't think she could handle giving up her pride just yet. She did miss him though. She tried her best to give Sophie a proper goodbye so as not to sadden the little girl any more than she had to be. But Hermione's pride kept her from facing Draco. She wished she could hear his voice or be in his arms again. He made her feel like everything would be alright. She felt like she could face anything as long as he was with her. Now he wasn't. She never realized just how much she had come to rely on him until he wasn't there to catch her anymore.
oOoOoOoOo
One day, Hermione saw the familiar shape of Hedwig flying towards her window. Extremely intelligent, Hedwig knew exactly when to come to Hermione. She knew to wait until the short window of time between the tutor's departure and the Grangers' return from work.
As always, Hermione was glad to see Hedwig and made sure to give her lots of water and treats she had hidden away. This time, the letter came from Luna.
Dear Hermione,
How are you holding up? We're all okay here. Missing you, of course. Nothing's the same without you here. I should let you know that Harry's coping well. I know you're probably worried about him. Ginny's doing a great job making sure he's functioning. Still, he hasn't been the same since you left. None of us are. I would blame it on Weevils but this time I know it's because of your absence. Which brings me to my important news – I've found a way for you to come back!
Ever since you left, we've all been trying to find a way for you to return to Hogwarts. We didn't tell you because we didn't want to get your hopes up. Of course, Harry told us about you refusing his help. I told him a Schniggle was probably nearby when he told you because no one in their right mind would refuse such an offer. I know you're a very strong person Hermione and capable of anything but sometimes, it's okay to accept help from friends. You don't always have to be the one looking out for us.
In any case, we also know how stubborn you can be so we've been trying to find a solution to your situation that would not require so much assistance from us. Finally, I found one! Once again, I don't want to get anybody's hopes up so please just keep this between us for now.
So I was in the Ravenclaw common room two days ago when I overheard Cho Chang tell Marietta Edgecombe that she needed new dress robes for her date with Cormac McLaggen. I won't bore you with the details but it got me thinking about how Cho always dated quidditch players and then that got me thinking about Cedric Diggory which then reminded me of the scholarship in his name! I almost fell out of my chair when I thought of it. We must have had wrackspurts in our ears because how could we have all forgotten about that? Anyway, so I looked into it and found out that the deadline for applying is the end of this week! So attached is the application form and all the details of the scholarship. The recipient gets their Hogwarts tuition fully funded until they graduate, which is exactly what you need. Good luck Hermione! I really hope you can come back to us soon!
Love always,
Luna
Hermione couldn't believe it. She read Luna's letter over and over again just to make sure it was real. For the first time since she left Hogwarts, she felt real hope.
oOoOoOoOo
A week later, the letter finally came. Hermione was eating dinner with her family when a Ministry owl flew to their window. Before her mother could say anything, Hermione opened the window and took the letter from the owl which promptly flew away. Despite her mother's protests, Hermione ran upstairs to her room and opened the letter with trembling hands.
Dear Ms. Granger,
We are pleased to inform you –
Hermione dropped the letter. She was so excited she couldn't help but let out a little yell. Her heart was beating so fast she thought it would burst out of her chest. She willed herself to calm down and gingerly picked up the letter.
Dear Ms. Granger,
We are pleased to inform you that you have been selected as the recipient of the Cedric Diggory scholarship. Attached are the details of the scholarship. We have notified the Headmaster of your status and he is looking forward to your return.
We are more than happy to support such a deserving young witch and we truly believe that had our son known you, he would've agreed with our assessment. We are sure that you will use your education to better the wizarding world so that our son's death would not have been in vain.
Congratulations once again.
Sincerely,
Amos and Cecilia Diggory
No sooner had Hermione finished reading the letter that another owl came to her window – this time, she recognized it as one of the Hogwarts' brown school owls.
Dear Ms. Granger,
Congratulations!
I was extremely pleased to hear about the results of the scholarship. I would have told you about it and I would have done everything in my power to ensure your stay at Hogwarts but as we discussed before you left, it was out of my hands. I regret the situation you had been put in but I'm glad that now there is a way for everything to be resolved.
Of course, as much as we would love for you to return to Hogwarts, I also know the situation with your parents. If you have decided to pursue a muggle life and not return to Hogwarts, I would completely understand and I sincerely wish you all the best.
If, however, you are still interested in returning to our humble school, Hogwarts is waiting and ready to welcome you back. I understand that this is a big decision which requires much thought. Take all the time that you need and know that no matter what, you will always have a home at Hogwarts. Simply let me know when you would like to return, if at all, and someone will come for you faster than you can say 'Lemon drop'.
Sincerely,
Albus Dumbledore
Hermione's smile got even bigger after reading Dumbledore's letter. She knew he tried his best. He had explained to her that tuition was not the issue at all and he would've let her stay for free if he could. However, the ministry's new rules prevented him from going against her parent's wishes. After the Triwizard Tournament and Dumbledore's "outrageous" claims of Voldemort's return, the ministry was so scared of him building an army that he was prevented from offering a place at Hogwarts to anyone whose guardians were still alive without their guardian's explicit permission. Dumbledore couldn't even help the student find a way to stay. Even if the student had run away from their parents and cut off ties with them, Dumbledore could not offer them a place at Hogwarts for free. If he was allowed to do so, the ministry was worried that students would be brainwashed into running away from their parents and joining Dumbledore. Of course, the whole thing was ludicrous and only a result of mass panic and hysteria, but those were the terms under which Dumbledore was reinstated as Headmaster of Hogwarts after Umbridge left.
In any case, Hermione did not even need to think twice about it. The only thing that held her back from leaving her parents was the knowledge that Hogwarts couldn't take her back even if they wanted to. She promptly wrote a reply back saying that she was ready to go immediately. With a flick of her wand, everything in her room started packing itself neatly into her trunk.
"Hermione!" Mrs. Granger's angry voice was coming up the stairs. "Hermione! Answer – " Mrs. Granger was stunned at the sight that met her when she opened her daughter's bedroom door.
Various things were flying about all over the room – clothes were coming out of the dresser and neatly folding themselves before making their way into a trunk, papers were stacking themselves, books were zooming back and forth around the room and in the middle of it all was Hermione with letters in her hand, grinning like a lunatic.
"What in heaven's name is going on?!"
For a moment, everything in the room stopped moving. Hermione met her mother's eyes. She calmly waved her hand and everything resumed their activity.
"I'm packing Mother," Hermione said simply.
"Packing? Whatever for?" Mrs. Granger's voice was extremely agitated.
"I'm leaving."
"Like hell you are!" Mrs. Granger yelled. "It was that ruddy owl wasn't it? I knew it! You're not going back to that stupid school! Wake up, Hermione! That's not real life!"
"No mother," Hermione's voice was rising. "This is not my life! Hogwarts is my life! I'm a witch mother, deal with it."
"You nasty little ingrate! Is that what they teach you at that bloody school – how to disrespect your parents? We raised you, we fed you, we clothed you, and this is how you repay us?! Witches don't bloody exist! We know you. We're only doing what's best for you!"
"No, you're doing what's best for you. All my life, I've done everything you wanted. Not once have you asked me what I wanted. You don't know me at all. You don't know my friends, my interests, my dreams. You have no idea what I've been through the past 6 years. I'm not a little girl anymore mother. I'm my own person. But all my life, you've had this preconceived plan for me – this ideal picture of me and what I should be doing that you stick to without a thought about what I want or what I need or even who I really am. But I'm done. I'm sick and tired of trying to please you all the time. It's my life and not yours and it's time I go back to it."
Hermione pulled her packed trunk out her bedroom door, leaving a stunned Mrs. Granger behind. She carried her trunk down the stairs and headed for the front door. Her father's voice stopped her for a moment.
"If you walk out that door, don't bother coming back," Mr. Granger said seriously. "Our daughter will be dead. If you leave this house, you leave this family forever."
With a sad, final glance at her father, Hermione walked out the door.