Don't you get it?

Chapter 4

Hello everyone. Okay so I completely deserted this story and didn't update for 3 months (oops don't hate me😩) but HERE I AM!!! And I promise I'm back on track with this story, so thank you for all the nice messages and enjoy this short little update!❤️
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"I don't know Amy.. okay?"

"Beca you have to know like this is a big deal, I mean do you even want to be with Jesse anymore?"

Beca couldn't believe she was even having this conversation and with all people she could have been having it with- she's having it with Amy. All because beca made a slight comment of not being in the mood to go to dinner with him tonight. And all of a sudden Amy is being Amy and asking extreme questions.

"Amy why are you so dramatic, I mean I'm tired. Just because I don't want to spend my every waking minute with him doesn't mean I feel any different towards him?"

"Okay so how do you feel?"

Beca sighed. Amy knew how much beca hated talking about her feelings, so she knew the overly confident blonde was trying to pull something out of her. Whatever the "something" is that she's looking for.

"Dude what is this? Why all the detailed questions?"

"Look beca I just don't want you wasting all your time if you're not 100% in it, like what is he to you?"

"Dude what does that even mean.. I guess he's like one of my best friends and can always make me laugh?" She answers unsurely and definitely awkwardly.

"See beca if someone asked me what bumper is to me, then I would reply with- my knight in shiny armour, my sexy burrito, my lover boy. Why don't you describe Jesse like that?"

"Um because he's not a Mexican food item."

"Shut it Mitchell, I'm just saying think about what you're saying and doing and feeling and thinking."

"You know you don't have to say 'and' four times in one sentence."

"It's called for dramatic purposes." And with that Amy left her room. Talk about dramatic purposes.

Beca throws herself back on her bed, still quite unsure as to how this conversation even emerged between her and Amy, when she literally just made the mistake of telling her she wasn't in the mood to go for dinner. She wonders what Amy meant, because even though not many people take her seriously, she knows that when Amy gets like that, she usually has a good reason and a reasonable approach to a situation. Which gave beca slight anxiety as to what exactly the blonde tried to achieve and why?

"Hey tiny" the sound of her voice instantly secured the brunette causing her to sit up.

"Beale." She smirked.

"Whatcha doing?" Chloe hummed while hopping on the bed next to beca.

"Well I had a weird and extremely confusing conversation with Amy, you know nothing new" she rolled her eyes causing the other woman to laugh.

"And what was this conversation exactly about?"

Beca laughed and threw her hands up. "To be honest I really don't even know, it was full of hidden secrets.. I mean I think she was trying to get me to say I don't think things with Jesse are working out."

Chloe felt her breathe hitch, and had to tell herself to not say anything stupid. Why? She doesn't know, but she feels guilty that she feels a sense of relief. "Wait are things not.. um.. working out?"

Beca doesn't know why but she notices Chloe getting shy, which is a rare occurrence. She tells herself Chloe just doesn't want to say anything to upset beca. At least that what she's tried to tell herself. "I mean I don't know, Amy said this thing about how she'd describe bumper and despite the weird puppy names that make me want to vomit, I do get why she said that to me because I know for a fact I wouldn't talk about Jesse the same as how she talks about bumper.. you get me?"

Chloe is confused and watches beca mumble and rant. She doesn't exactly know what beca is talking about, but she knows she's going to soon. Beca often did this- quicky announces something in a very confusing manner and then notices and will explain herself. "Like she spoke about him, as if she's really like attracted to him, and in love with him, and I don't know like I just don't think I think of Jesse like that you get me? Like I think of him more as a best friend than a boyfriend.. is that a real dick thing for me to say yeah.."

Chloe grabs becas hand, she doesn't really know why but it felt like the right thing to do. It's what she always did when beca began to doubt herself. "Becs." She sighed.

"You don't have to make this decision right now, okay you're confused about your feelings, that's okay. Everyone gets like that, it's part of being in a relationship. But stop dwelling on it now and stop thinking you're shitty for thinking it. But I mean yeah Jesse is a great guy and seems to make you happy, but if you don't even know if you're attracted to him now, then maybe you should just sit down with yourself and think everything through before you make any big decision regarding your relationship. I mean think could aswell just be Amy's confusing way of talking getting to you"

Beca felt her stomach flip when Chloe spoke to her in that tone. That reassuring tone where she knew Chloe meant every single word she said. She's so grateful to have someone like Chloe in her life. "Thank you chlo, you always know what to say. It's just this time I think she's right. And it's not that my mind is playing tricks is that I'm suddenly realising it, at least I think, and that scares me because he's such a good guy you know?"

Chloe knew he was a good guy, she couldn't argue with that statement. Because he was, a really good guy. "Okay let's say you did feel like ending things with him for now. Okay you were together for two and half years, you had a great positive relationship, but now you don't know if you feel it anymore. Right? So Jesse is a great man and as you said is like one of you're closest friends, do you really think he'd hold this against you or hate you for it? No he'd want whatever makes you happy. And yeah am I even a little shocked by this, and of course he will be too.. but you have to understand that you gotta do what you want to do." Chloe looked directly into becas eyes as a way of trying to get through to her, and she watched as becas eyes burned back at her. Before she added.
"And what's the point of being with someone romantically if you're not even attracted to them, like attraction is so important in a relationship" this time she said that much quieter in an almost whisper, and she watched as becas eyes quicky ran to her lips and back to her eyes and she cleared her throat.

Beca wonders why her mouth suddenly went dry when Chloe chose to whisper those words to her, how her heart jumped and her hairs at the back of her neck stood up. And that very fact makes her wonder why during the whole time she's been with Jesse she can't remember feeling anything like that. Yet chloes words managed to have an effect on her. She's her best friend, she shook the thought.
"Um.. thank you Chloe you always know what to do. And you're totally right. I know it's kind of a shocker, but now I'm realising it's like I can feel that I've actually felt like this a long time, I guess I'm too scared of change i never really felt the need or want to talk about it. I'll have to talk to him soon"

Chloe smiled, and squeezed the brunettes hand tighter. She cherished moments like this. When Beca Mitchell, opened up to her. Which took a long while to happen, but now she feels privileged as she knows she's one of the very limited people who are as lucky to experience a fragile beca. She's grateful that beca trusts her enough to confide in her.
"Sleepover time?" Chloe added.

Beca laughed lightly, "it's almost as if you think I'd expect you to walk allllllll the way across the hall"

Chloe rolled her eyes and hopped into her usual spot next to her best friend, as she nudged her for her ever so annoying sarcasm.
"Hey Mitchell don't get cheeky with me, or else"

Beca smirked to the ginger, "oh? Or else what?" 

Chloe turned on her side already feeling her eyes droop, "haven't thought about it yet"

Beca just nudged her back, and she too began to fall asleep. Feeling much better having spoken properly about the situation which she knows she's been avoiding within herself. The fact she was able to talk about it with one of the most important people in her life and then fall asleep next to her, made her feel hopeful that everything is okay.