Blackpink 5th Member- Kiko

5: Conflicted

The contract had been signed and almost a week after meeting the blackpink members, YG himself told me that i could move into their dorm.

1 day before moving

YG sajangnim had brought me into his office to discuss how the media release for me joining the group would be set tomorrow. Oblivious as to why he thought it was important to share it with me I blankly smiled at his unusually stern face.

"Are you not scared?" he enquired, I looked at him puzzled. "Is there anything I should be scared of?" I asked. He then went on to tell me the potential hate I would be facing from the public. I hadn't thought about it before but it certainly seemed likely now that he had mentioned it. Blackpink was a group that was successful from the get go but bringing in a new member was prone to confusing the public. After all, I had been brought in as a replacement after Kriesha denied the place.

Confusing right? Basically, Kriesha was supposed to debut alongside Blackpink but due to health issues she pulled out the group just a couple of days before my evaluation. Since the group was prepared to return as a five-member group, YG sajangnim decided that regardless of the fact that Kriesha denied the place someone else could fill it. If Kriesha had made it instead of me there wouldn't be anything to worry about as the general public already knew her. I was a different case.

Moving/Press Release Day

Around 8:00AM I had moved all my belongings into the blackpink dorm. I tried to move quietly as the members were still sleeping after a late schedule. I had my own room just like the other 4 members but I glammed it up a considerable amount more:

At about 11:00AM I had successfully finished organising my room and was about to buy something to eat. I walked out my room and tiptoed along the corridor but Lisa had woken up and noticed me trying to scuffle out. "Yah, Jiyeon-ie, when did you come?" she said excitedly while pulling me towards her for a hug. "A little while ago, I just finished organising my room, wanna see?" I asked bouncing up and down. She squealed in excitement as I dragged her towards my room.'TA-DA' I said. She admired it and complimented how nice it looked. We must have been pretty loud as all the other members had walked into my room and greeted me too.

We stayed chatting in my room for another hour( well atleast 4 of us were, Jisoo unnie had passed out on my bed) before Lisa unnie complained about being hungry. As if she was triggered by the word, Jisoo unnie suddenly woke up and said "FOOD? LEZ GO LEZ GO" laughing uncontrollably the 4 exited my room so that we could grab brunch together.

Kiko/Jiyeon Outfit:

Lisa's Outfit:

Rosé's Outfit:

Jennie's Outfit:

Jisoo's Outfit:

We had brunch at a really nice place but it was kind of like a hideout. The restaurant wasn't really out in the open which was consequently perfect for us as I couldn't really be seen with them until the media release was over.

The members and I had a very common interest and that was food. All of us loved it. Except Jennie unnie who had her on and off days presumably as she was someone who like her exercise very much and ate rather healthily.

After finishing our food we were chatting and looking at our phones when jisoo unnie gasped. My media release had taken place and it had a rather negative output.

Although Jisoo unnie would not let me look at the article, i excused myself to the bathroom where I searched it up on my phone. There were no pictures or info about me just the raw information that there would be a new member. Scrolling down to the comments section there were a ton of people excited to see the new addition but a large amount of comments were hateful criticising YG for adding a member for no reason.

At this point I was really scared. The reality had finally hit me. People weren't going to accept me after my debut. I broke down in tears and silently sobbed while slowly Jennie unnie made her way into the bathroom she came over and started comforting me silently. After a while she said, " I think everyone has these points in their career especially when you become an idol. Everything you say or do is carefully monitored and it may be burdening. It was the same for me. A little bit after I debuted there were rumours that I bullied a girl back in New Zealand. I even had an article about how I always look nastily to others. No matter how innocent we are these things won't stop. And so we have to be able to cope with them okay. Just pretend like you never saw those comments."

I felt better after she said that. Of course it was an expected response from the public but I guess we kind of just have to pull through and ignore them.