Chasing Fire

A Fork in the Road - Part 17

"I am don't want to leave Alaska."  Noralee was satisfied that only the ghosts of the Gold Dust Saloon were wandering around below them as they returned to their room upstairs.  "Most importantly, I don't want to leave you behind either.  I know we just met each other but I feel like it will hurt worse than anything if we aren't together.  Does that make sense?"  She knew she was nervous and rambling, but her mind was set about staying, unless Bear told her he didn't want her to stay.  The rejection wouldn't be welcomed, but she somewhat expected it the way her life was going so far. 

He sat on the end of the bed and licked his lips in an almost wolf like gesture.  Whether the gesture was contemplative or nervous, she could not tell.  She knew she hit him with big news and suddenly had second thoughts about breaching the subject of what they were doing together. They weren't officially boyfriend and girlfriend.  Honestly, she didn't know what they were:  Friendly acquaintances, amorous travelers or long lost soul mates?  The possibility of them becoming anything seemed ridiculous standing at the intersection of together or apart, a couple or two singles.  How do they go forward when they don't know which way to go?  Why had she said anything at all?  He seemed uncomfortable and Noralee had an idea why. 

"You don't want me to stay do you?  Is this why we haven't slept together yet?  You don't want me?"  She was just going to lay the thoughts in her mind out there.  Ridiculous and humiliating, she knew it was best to speak from the heart.  There was little time left to not say the things that were important.  If she was going to change her life, she needed to be sure it would be worth it.  She was tired of playing house.  She wanted a real life with someone that loved her. 

"Wait Noralee.  You are going too fast.  One thing at a time.  Why are you so impatient?  Always planning for tomorrow.  Can't we enjoy this one day at a time?"  He looked up at her and held out his hand to her.  "Come sit by me." 

"Oh no!"  Noralee knew this was going to be the let her down easy talk.  The "it is not you, it is me" conversation that was a kind way of cutting the strings of attachment.  Tears started to sting the corners of her eyes as she bravely sat on the edge of the bed beside him. 

"Why are you crying?"  His tone was gentle and kind.  She never thought he would be the one to hurt her.  She always thought it would be her coming to her senses and leaving him alone in an airport waving Goodbye. 

"You don't want me to stay.  You want me to leave.  I understand.  I don't have any reason to stay if you don't want me to."  Her breath was beginning to catch in her throat making it harder for her to speak. 

He gave her the strangest expression and stared at her in disbelief, "Whatever gave you that idea?  If anything, I was going to make sure we got lost and you missed your flight!" 

Noralee sat upright and then collapsed into hugging him.  "Oh, GOOD!!  I have problems reading people.  I don't want to leave you.  This has been the best week of my life.  I know it is crazy because we just met, but I feel like I have never been without you!"  It felt good to be honest and tell him her thoughts and feelings.  A relief washed over her restoring the tranquility of her heart.  As long as he felt the same way as she did everything would work out for the best.

"I don't ever want you to leave me.  I was afraid to say anything because, yes, it is crazy we have only known each other a week.  I can honestly say, I don't think I can do without you now that I have spent time with you.  You are special.  Someone I only imagined in my dreams of a perfect woman.  I don't know why you would want to stay with me, but I am not complaining.  You can stay with me as long as you want and I will never tell you to leave."  He kissed her cheeks, wiping away the tears on her flushed cheeks. 

Noralee was so happy she started laughing a little between her crying jags.  Elegant and smooth she was not, but the emotions would not be hushed on the happiest day of her life, "I don't think I could do without you either."  She tried to control her emotions which seemed to be all over the place like a game of ping pong ranging between elation, euphoria to depression and sadness.

"I have a plan.  The only thing stopping me from staying is my student loans hanging over me.  What if we found gold?  If we found enough I could pay them off or most of it.  I could even try to get a job teaching here.  I am sure they need teachers in Alaska."   She was actually seeing a possibility in an impossible scenario.

"It is a good plan, but it will take a lot of hard work.  There is also no guarantee we will find enough to pay it all...unless."  He paused and she almost thought he trembled a little, like a thought so powerful it sends a shiver through the body, "I know of a place that has a secret vein, but I can't share it with you unless..."  He paused again, unsure of what he was going to say next.

"What is it?  You can tell me.  Go on."  Noralee was dying to know what it was he was wanted to say but found so difficult. 

Bear fished a gold nugget about the size of a quarter out of his pocket and held it front of Noralee's eyes.  "Imagine this nugget is a ring.  It is unshapen and not much more than a chunk of a mineral, but it is like our plans and dreams.  One day they will take a shape and be something we can hold onto forever.  I am going to have it made into a ring when I get to a town.  A simple band of gold you could wear your whole life and it will never break, tarnish or wear out.  Just like my love for you." 

The tears came back to Noralee's eyes.  He was asking her THE QUESTION, the one she thought Dewayne was going to ask her a few weeks ago.  But why did it seem like that night in the restaurant was years ago?  All the air in the room seemed thin and unreachable to her lungs.  Was it possible to suffocate from too much happiness?  She struggled to focus and breathe, her hands trembled uncontrollably.

He got up from the bed and bent down slowly on one knee.  She could have planted kisses all over his sweet face, but she started crying for real this time.  "Oh Dear!!  I don't think I even brushed my hair today!"

Staring up at her with his clear blue eyes he spoke softly, "Noralee Hale with messy hair from Fair Hope, Alabama, will you marry me and share my life?"  He placed the nugget in her hand.  "Everything that is mine will be yours.  I promise, although it seems like I don't have anything, I will never let you go hungry or cold.  I will always take care of you and I will always love you."   

"Yes!"  Noralee was stunned but managed to blurt out the one syllable word.  "Yes! I want to marry you!  Wait, what is your last name?"  She started to laugh because she realized she never asked for him last name, or maybe she did and she forgot it!  How could she do that?  She wracked her brain trying to remember and since his last name  was going to be hers, well, it was sort of important. 

He was laughing too, "Funny how we never got around to that, huh?  I don't think I know your middle name either.  I know that your lips taste like strawberries and cream, your skin is like silk under your chin and your cheeks turn bright pink when you are nervous."  He ran his fingers under her chin, "Brown.  My last name is Brown." 

"Noralee Amelia Brown.  I think I can live with that."  She leaned over and gave him the biggest kiss she had ever given anyone.  It turned from sweet to passionate quickly, but he broke away gently.

"We are going to do this the right way.  I don't want your parents to think I am some absconding scoundrel.  We are not sleeping together until we get married.  First we get the gold and pay off your loan, then I meet your family." 

"No Bear.  I can't wait that long.  Let's get married now and then get the gold, finally meet the parents.  We can spend the whole summer on a Gold Mining Honeymoon.  Then we can meet parents....God help us."  She was not going to wait any longer than she had to and if her parents ever met Bear they would do everything in their power to stop them.  He was too different from her people and they would never understand him the way she did.  Even though they had only been together for a week it was long enough for her, as crazy as it sounded even to her.  Some things you just knew and could never explain why.  Intuition?  She could hear her Mother screaming and crying, but pushed the thought away.  This was the path she was choosing for her own happiness.

"I like your idea better, but only if you are sure.  I have waited all my life for someone like you.  What is a couple more months?"  He swept her off her feet and danced her around the room to the faint, phantom pianola music below them.