suicide storys

MADDIE

Well i see a lot of other people sharing their stories on here and honestly i don't know where to start but here it goes

Around the time of being in the 3rd grade i was called fat by one kid and i stopped eating on and off through out the forth grade i started cutting not bad it didn't get bad until i was maybe in the 7th grade i was taken out of school in the middle of my 7th grade year the teachers were making me stressed out and bulling me we moved and i got home schooled but i didn't do work all day i just would lay in bed and cry i didn't know why i was crying i just started crying you know that point where you can just feel so much pain that it makes your tummy turn and your chest feel like you have no air in your lungs that's what i felt everyday for a year so i was home by myself all day everyday just not on the weekends and that's when things got bad i stopped eating completely i wouldn't talk to anyone i would just read or sleep when i started losing weight i wanted to lose more and more and more like it was never good enough my family just sat back and watched as i slowly died in front of them i started puking up everything i still do just not as bad but it's getting worse again i started cutting 10 times day then 20 30 45 50 70 90 100 200 it just kept getting worse i have scars in places i don't even like talking about but I'm standing here today would scars that are fading and a smile on my face telling myself I'm a warrior and that if i can take a blade to my skin or make myself starve for days then i sure as hell can pull through and get better and be happy i am each day it's going to be a battle but every teenager i have seen on the page has made me want to hug them and just tell them how beautiful they are male or female) whatever you are going through whatever hell you have to walk through everyday i promise there has to be something better. Something that's going to take all that pain the hurt you feel the voices you hear call you worthless or ugly fat whatever your demons tell you aren't true and you are strong and beautiful so what of you don't weigh 80 pounds and have a thigh gap i know it would be nice but you are beautiful the way you are whatever every girl was the same size? The world wouldn't be the same it would be boring. It wouldn't be earth it would be freaking Barbie movie and forget that because i love that we all have different shapes and don't let some skinny girl tell you different. You want to wear and shirt that shows your arms and a little chubbiness don't hide it do it! Love yourself! That's the key to getting better is love yourself more than anything. You are a warrior and i promise you if you keep fighting a little harder you will win this battle because no one ever loses we just give up.

~ with love maddie