The Journal of a Connecticut Yankee

The Best of Intentions

December 21st

My watch alarm woke me along with the feeling of something warm, soft and cuddly attached to my side. Looking down, Romie was clutching to me in her sleep, I could see there was a slight amount of drool from her that was wetting my t-shirt as well.

Eww... I really hoped she had all her shots.

Reaching over, I silenced the alarm. So much for Condition 2 and 3, I sighed. Reaching down I did a quick self-check of the boys, they seemed ok so at least she abided by Condition 1.

Poking her cheek, I whispered,

"Hey... Time to get up Sunshine, I gotta go to work."

"Mmm five more minutes." She mumbled as she hugged me tighter.

I wanted to tell myself that this wasn't nice. That there wasn't some part of me deep down that wanted to hug her back and enjoy some kind of sleepy companionship in a nice warm bed with a cute girl. Even if it was just for a little while. I swallowed hard, couldn't exactly allow myself such luxuries. There was shit to do.

Pulling myself out of her embrace I proceeded to get dressed. Turning back towards the bed, I saw that she had vanished and there was a small folded note where she had once been laying.

Opening it, I struggled with the words. She wrote it in a cursive that made reading it much harder. You see, the written language here was a whole different ball game. I had a basic understanding of the alphabet here but it was much more difficult then anything back home. To be honest, I was close to being borderline illiterate. After a while, I was able to piece together what she wrote. It read:

Thank you for a magical night, you were amazing,

Love Romie 💋

At the end there was a kiss mark from her pressing her lips on the paper. Huh, didn't know they had lipstick here?

Suddenly, the mark itself flew up and kissed me on the cheek. I instinctively slapped it. Looking over to a mirror I found there was nothing there. Peering back to the paper, the mark was still there... some stupid Wonderland magic I guessed.

**************

It was mid morning as the conference began. The Order delegates arrived first. Inquisitior Fredrickson and his two companions. The first one appeared to be a Paladin as he had on armor covered with so many holy symbols he could have just been mistaken for a NASCAR driver. He also had a look that just screamed dick that matched his personality as he sneered at me during introductions. Classy... real classy...dick.

The other was a Lucy Lawless look-alike cept on roids. Old Xena, appeared to have quite a bit of city miles on her but I was sure she could kick my ass, so I made certain to be polite to the Warrior Princess.

The Mamono delegates arrived soon after. Katrina, I already knew, followed by some kung fu panda looking chick, then... soooonnnnn of a bitch.... look what the cat dragged in... Romie .. I guess Puss n Boots was more than what she seemed. That's what I get for taking in strays.

Romie saw me glaring at her and waved with a smile. I glared even harder in hopes my pyrotechnic powers would somehow set her on fire. Damn still no luck on that.

"A friend of yours?" Inquisitior Fredrickson asked. I knew what the asshole was trying to get at.

"Nah, just someone I met at the bar last night. Gave her the disappointment of her life," I said truthfully.

That seemed to appease him as we all sat down for the shindig.

2 hours later...

I sighed as the roar of voices arguing reached an almost deafening level. I had to do something fast before shit got even more out of hand. Faced with extremely limited options, I did what any normal, sane person would do... I pulled out my gun.