Against Hope

10 | Touch

Emily's POV

I woke up wrapped in someones arms. I looked up and saw Rose still asleep next to me. It was the first time that I was able to fall asleep at night, it was the first time that I didn't have any nightmares that would wake me up in the middle of the night. It was the first time that when I thought about Madison, I didn't lose myself all over again.

Rose's eyes fluttered open after a few minuets and when she looked down at me, she gave me a small smile as we both sat up and leaned against my bed frame. Without making it noticeable, I looked under the sheets and saw that we both only had a t-shirt on and underwear. 

Rose slowly got out of bed and I watched as she put on her shorts before sitting on the edge of my bed. I never noticed until now, her natural beauty. Even with her blonde messy hair, she managed to still look pretty,

"Em, we need to talk" She says and I nod as I sit up a bit straighter. I knew that we had to have this talk because I was confused about everything between us too. "I don't really know how to start..."

"Do you like me in that way? Rose, I want you to be honest with me" I say and Rose looks away from me.

"Em, you know I love you. Just, not in the way you expect." Rose says and I nod. "I don't really know how to explain this without hurting you Em. Like when I kiss you and touch you there's just this addicting feeling I can't get rid of and I don't really want too. And sleeping with you, I like it Em. I just can't be with you. I can't be in a relationship with you."

"I understand" I say and Rose looks into my eyes. She grabs my hand and squeezes it. 

"What's going through your mind, Em? You can tell me" she says and I nod.

"I like what we have, right now. I don't think I would be able to handle being in a relationship with someone but what we have right now, I like it." I say with a small smile and Rose smiles back at me. 

"I have to get going, or my parents will think I've ran away or something." She kisses the top of my head and before she climbs out of my window she looks at me. "Come over tonight" she says.

"Okay, I will" I say with a smile.

"I'll see you tonight then" she smiles back at me and then she was gone.

I lay down on my bed and I let out a deep breath. For once, I was able to breathe without feeling like I was suffocating. For once I actually feel good. After a few minuets, I went downstairs where my mom was making breakfast.

"Hey Emily, did you sleep okay?" She asks and I sit down at the kitchen table and nod my head with a smile. "You seem like you're in a good mood. Everything okay?" She asks as she sets down a plate of pancakes in front of me.

"Yeah, everything is okay" I say with another smile.

"Well, how are you doing?" She asks.

"Mom, you don't have to worry. I am going to be okay, I promise" I say with a smile and my mom smiles back at me. It was good to see her smile, I felt bad knowing that my bad state of mind was affecting her too.

"Well, I have to head to work. Call me if you need anything, okay? I love you" My mom says and she was out the door. I took another deep breath. Everything is going to be okay.

I spent the day catching up on school work. I was behind on a lot and I knew it was my fault for skipping school for so long, but it gave me something to keep my mind off of the obvious. At around six o'clock I decided to start heading over to Rose's house. 

I had this feeling in the pit of my stomach. It was like butterflies in my stomach whenever I thought about Rose. Honestly, I didn't like her in that way either so we were on the same page. But, I was feeling the exact same thing she was feeling. I liked the way her lips felt on mine, and I liked the way it felt when she touched me. 

*

I parked my car on the side of the street and approached her front door with a knock. It took a few seconds before the door opened and Rose looked at me with a smile. She was wearing a white tank top with pajama bottoms. 

I followed her up to her room and for a while we sat on her bed and talked about whatever came to mind and when it went silent I looked at Rose.

"Are your parents home?" I ask. Rose checked her phone. 

"They won't be until late." Rose says. With that she stands up and I stand up too thinking that we were going to go downstairs to get food or something. That's when Rose closed and locker her door and turned to face me. Stared at me for a while before she slowly walked over to me. She slowly began unbuttoning the buttons on my flannel and eventually took it off revealing my bare skin and bra. 

The entire time, her eyes were locked with mine before she took a step back and took off her white tank top and throwing it down to the floor, revealing her bra and bare skin. My heart was racing as she started taking off her pajama pants and I did the same until we were both staring at each other in our bras and underwear. 

Rose then began to unhook her bra and my heart was racing as her bra fell to the ground. She slowly walked over to me and unhooked my bra and it to, fell to the ground and that's when her lips found mine. Rose's body was pressed against mine as she kissed me and I pulled away, gasping for air. 

"Are you okay?" She whispers as she presses her forehead against mine. I nod as I kiss her once again. Her hands began to caress my breasts and I let out a stifled moan as I continued to bring her even closer to me.

Rose eventually pushed me onto the bed where she towered over me. She looked me in the eyes. 

"Em?"

"Yeah?

"I want you to know... that you're never going to be alone" She whispers. I smile at her as I bring her lips towards mine.

**********
Thanks for reading! I hope you liked it!

Warm regards,
Hannah