In Time

Chapter 4

It's been around 3 years and he still looks the same. Luckily he doesn't see me at all.

My throat clogs up and I'm this far away from tearing up.

"Jen? Jen?"

I jump. "Are you okay? You look like you've seen a ghost" Matt frowns.

"I... well" I stammer. "Excuse me, I need to visit the washroom".

"Of course", he says as he helps me up.

And it is just my rotten luck that I have to walk past his table to go to the washroom. Squaring my shoulders, I do just that. A waitress arrives at his table though, just in time and I leave a sigh of relief.

In the washroom, I put my wrists under the cold water to calm myself. My eyes are wide and after a couple of deep breaths, I look normal.

I don't know why but I check if I look fine- my hair is still perfectly in a coiffure. The magenta dress is slightly off-shoulder and it is only now that I feel a little exposed. The string of pearls I'm wearing was once a wedding gift from his mother, Joanna. All I remember about her was that she hated me with all her might. And she destroyed everything I held near.

By the time I'm out of the washroom, I've attained the perfect composure. As I walk past his table, I'm careful of observing his reactions. His gaze flickers over me, but then his blazing blue eyes snap back to me. For a fraction of a second, we hold gazes and then I'm past him. There are a number of mirrors around here, and so I scan his reflections- and boy, is he shocked. There is a wild look about him and he looks angry- his fists bunched.

When I've seated opposite Matt again, he lifts a brow as if asking, "What was that before?"

My head is bowed; I'm rearranging the napkin on my lap, when I state, "My husband is here".

His reaction is immediate- his fists curl and a tic in his jaw appears. He says, and I can realize how much he is controlling his anger, "Ex-husband" he corrects he. "Where?"

I point carefully and Matt's brows furrow when he sees David Cole.

Our food arrives just then and we silently dine, the previous jolly camaraderie seemingly disappearing. I can hardly eat and Matt notices after a while. Soft music is playing in the background and it is somewhat soothing. Couples have started twirling on the dance floor, and Matt takes this chance.

"Come on, dance with me?"

I smile and nod. Anything to help me remain stable at this moment. "He's looking this way", I murmur.

Matts suddenly tugs me close, and murmurs, his warm breath grazing my throat. "Then let's give him a show".

We start dancing and it is strangely nostalgic. Matt and I are dancing extremely close and I lean my head on his shoulder. This is so strange. Unconsciously, my eyes close and in my head, I'm dancing with David- our first dance as Mr and Mrs Cole. Outside, to onlookers, I suppose Matt and I look like a couple deep in love. But in my head, I'm reminiscing my first dance with David.

Matt and I dance for a long time, with him holding me tight. We probably reek of intimacy. All the while, I can feel David's eyes on me.

When we go back to our own seats, I cannot help but glance over at David's table. He's busy speaking on the phone, just as he used to back when we were together. Always busy. There's the usual crease on his forehead as he frowns. I quickly look away before he can look my way.

The dinner is nice; and Matt and I love the dessert especially, both of us having an incurable sweet tooth. My mood, however, had dampened.

As dinner closes, Matt's hand closes over mine. His grip is warm and tight. But it is not unwelcome.

"Are you alright, honey?" he asks concerned.

"Yes, of course" I smile.

"You know, you've never told me how this came about" he steers me away from our table and moves us towards the chairs laid outside on the balcony. I avoid looking back towards David. We settle down on the chairs and a waiter comes and serves chilled champagne.

"This, as in?"

"I mean... How you ended up in this small town, your divorce... everything"

I can't help but smile as I shake my head.

"That's a story for another day, Matt".

He pauses and then says, "As you wish, then".

We gaze down at the beautiful countryside for a while, in companionable silence.

The wind picks up after a while and in the far distance, the sky above the city line grows stormy. A storm is coming.

"We should get going", Matt murmurs. 

I nod and stand up. In my heart, I hope I can see David one last time before I go. 

Rain is pelting down by buckets, by the time we're seated comfortably in Matt's car. The silence is tense and the rolling thunder in the distance only makes me more anxious.

Matt clears his throat and I make myself ready for the inevitable question.

"So uhh... Is David Cole your husband? The David Cole?"

I roll my eyes. It didn't help that David had been featured five times now under the Most Influential list, Richest Men list and also the Sexiest Men alive. Everybody knew him it seemed, and that was why I chose to disappear completely after the divorce.

"It's just that... Christ, Jen! There was such a ruckus over your divorce; I must have been halfway across the country then and yet I remember the chaos it created. Surprisingly, I never came across a picture of yours"

"Thank God none of the townspeople did" I murmur.

Matt gives me a sideways glance. "Was that why you chose our town?"

"Isn't it obvious Matt? Of course I wanted some privacy. The weeks leading up to the divorce were chaotic and I was sick and tired of people clicking pictures and personal questions straight up to my face. It was a bad time and I needed space"

"And nobody found you?" Matt asks incredulous.

"Nope! Until today that is... I hope David suddenly doesn't take it to his mind- to look for me. God knows what I would do then". I don't say it out loud to Matt but I probably would take him back. I was still weak with my stupid love for him, even after all that had happened, and I am disgusted with myself.

"We're there for you Jenny, Ashley and I. You're family now". He reaches out and grabs my hand, giving me a firm clasp as if to consolidate what he has just said. I smile at him, despite the sinking feeling I have.

Luckily the rains have stopped when we arrive, and after vehemently insisting Matt to just stay in the car, I step out and rush home.

Thank God I didn't get wet outside, I pray; cleaning silk dresses were a real pain. It's almost 12 and so I rush to have a quick shower and then turn in quickly. Tomorrow is Monday and I have to go to work. 

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Hey readers! 

Another fun fact for you all- The idea for this story was the result of a dream I saw actually. 

How are you all doing? I wonder, whom do you picture as Matt??

Lots of love, 

Suze