Wrong ||Park Jimin

Nine

"H-Hana?"

"Y-You. What are you doing here?"

I was fuming. Memories were returning. Namjoon and Jimin were still inside, and I had no one to hold onto while the tears fell ceaselessly.

"Hana, how are you here? Who-"

"I know-" I gulped, my voice shaking. "I know Jimin. We're best- best friends."

His eyes softened.

"Best friends?"

I nodded, tears still falling.

"Well, how-" His voice broke as mine did a while ago.

"How have you been?"

I laughed. "You wouldn't know, would you? You left me here, ALONE, after telling me I could trust you! You're asking how am I?"

My body shook. A wave of panic hit, but I suppressed it.

I had to tell him I didn't need him in my life again. That I was okay without him.

I had to lie.

"You want to know how I am? I'M FINE! I'M PERFECTLY FINE! Ask Namjoon, you know? After all, he's my-"

I choked.

"Hana? What's going- Ah, hyungs are back." Namjoon stepped out with Jimin.

Jimin looked at my tear-streaked face.

"Hana, what happened? Why are-"

"Ask Namjoon, how I am. Like I said, he'll know, as my doctor."

"D-Doctor?"

But I had left. I had successfully suppressed my rising panic, but it wouldn't calm as easily.

***

I looked up at the ceiling, after taking my medication.

"Why, why, why, WHY?"

Shouting wasn't helping.

"WHY DID YOU COME BACK?"

My phone had countless missed calls from Jimin and Namjoon.

But I picked up none of them.

"He was the only one I loved, truly. The only one.."

I had been crying for the past two hours.

Whenever I stopped, a past image would pop up. Us laughing, smiling at each other, with each other, our late night talks, and the tears would recommence.

"It didn't hurt this much when he left," I muttered to myself, laughing bitterly.

There were knocks at my door.

"Hana! Hana, please open up! Hana, come on!"

It was Jimin. I could hear him through my open window.

"I'm sorry, Ji. I can't. I can't let you see me like this. I can't lose you." I whispered.

I heard more shouts.

"HYUNG WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER!"

"Jimin-ah, I-"

"NO! She was the only one who was getting close to curing me and you-"

Curing?

"Ji-"

"HYUNG I SAID NO!"

"DON'T raise your voice with me, I dare you to."

"Hyung, she was the only one who got close. Who showed me more feelings than you all have shown me in years!"

Jimin.

I wiped my tears.

I couldn't be weak. I need to get over this phobia, don't I? This is the first step.

As I walked down the stairs, the shouts got louder.

"Jimin, I didn't think she react this way! Heck, I didn't know it was HER!"

"THAT IS NOTHING TO ME! YOU HURT HER IN SOME WAY AND I'M GOING TO FIND OUT WHY SHE REACTED THE WAY SHE DID!"

He was fuming.

I stepped out the door, to see Jimin holding him by the collar.

"Hyung, you better tell me what you did-"

"This is no way to treat your Hyung, Jimin."

"What kind of 'Hyung' won't tell me what happened? What made Hana cry?"

He was hysterical.

"Hyung, you know what I'm feeling? Its sadness. Anger. Betrayal. You know what I felt with her? Happiness. Which is better, hyung? Tell me!"

But he didn't say anything. He stood there, gaping at Jimin.

"You-you fee-"

"That's why she means so much to me. And you? What did you do to her?"

"Jimin?"

He look at me and sighed.

"Hana!"

Instantly I was wrapped in a hug and his scent overwhelmed me.

The feeling of comfort returned, scaring me yet again.

But less.

So I stayed there and let myself cry into his shirt. Neither of us cared about anything.

"Hana, what happened? Why'd you run away? Why are you crying?"

My body shook in his grasp.

I didn't answer, just held him tighter.

"Oh, Hana, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I should never have asked you to meet my friends I-"

"Jimin! There you are! Where's Hana?"

Namjoon shouts of worry cut through the sound of sniffling.

"Jimin-ah," His voice was soft. "Are you...crying?"

"He is. He...Namjoon he-"
It was him.

"I know." His voice held pride

"But what did you do that made her react like this, I want to know."

He didn't answer.

"Hana, please forgive me, I'm sor-"

I clutched him tighter.

"It's okay, Jimin. You didn't know he would be the one."

My cheek pressed against his chest as I spoke, my sobs finally calming.

"I'll never ever force you into an-"

I pulled away. "Ji. Its okay! I made so many new friends today, and it's because you pestered me to come. I'm glad you did, Jiminie. Ignoring whatever happened is the right way to go, yeah?"

He nodded, and I could see his eyes glistening.

Something sliced through my heart and I almost choked up.

"Ah, Ji, please don't." And I hugged him again.

He knew what I meant, but he let his tears fall.

"These tears are not what you think they are, Hana."