Memoir of Summer [Editing]

Chapter 5

(Because it was my ever supportive reader's birthday request. So here it is, vakla.😂 Hepi bertde again, dear!😘)

"Tell me I was not imagining things. Summer, tell me you have felt me too."

I reached for her hands but I have felt nothing but cold thin air. Sinubukan ko ulit, ilang ulit na, pero wala. Hindi ko na siya maramdaman. Walang imik si summer. She looked lost.

"Argh, damn!" Sinabunutan ko ang sarili ko dahil sa inis. 'Yung feeling na para akong malalagutan ng hininga dahil sa frustration.

God. Was that a miracle? Or was it a sign for something bigger that is yet to come?

I was pulled out of my reverie when I heard sobs. It was from Summer. Here she is in front of me again, crying and I can do nothing. Sucks! I fucking hate it.

"Nakakainis!" She blurted out while she brushed off every tear so harshly that her pale skin reddened. I tried to stop her because she might skinned her fac, but hell I can't touch her.

"Summer," I called softly but only sobs were her response, and it's breaking me.

"Stop it. You're hurting yourself," I added.

"Nakakainis kasi!" She shouted and her cries loudened.

"Miracle na nga naging bato pa," she added. It was a serious one for her but that earned small chuckles from me. Seryoso na sana eh. Too innocent, baby.

Nagpunta ako sa likod niya habang may ngiti pa rin sa labi. I wrapped my arms at her small waist, and she looked stunned. I closed my eyes at pinakiramdaman ang malamig na hangin na nasa pagitan ng mga braso ko.

"It's okay if I can't touch you, but if I would given another chance, why not? I would love too!" I chuckled. Summer, on the other hand, muttered no words. I sighed for that. I cleared my voice and tightened my hold as if I could really hug her.

"What matters to me is that we are together. 'Yung maramdaman ko lang 'yung presenya mo, okay na ako do'n. Sapat na 'yun," seryosong bigkas ko.

I looked at her sideward, to see her reaction, but nothing could be read in her face.

"A-ang drama mo!" she said nervously before she disappeared. Napahinga na lang ako ng malalim habang nakahawak sa balakang ko. Ito na naman siya. Whenever I'm trying to speak up for my feelings, she runs away, and it fucking sting.

I stayed for a minute to wait for her. Baka kasi mapagod din 'yun magtago at magpakita na. Pero dumaan na ang isang oras pero wala pa rin siya.

I sighed. Ala una na ng umaga sa bagong araw na 'to. Tapos na ang kahapon. Maybe I would make it up for this celebration next year. I just hope so.

***

Nagising ako nang dahil sa isang napakalakas na kulog. I looked at my window and the rain outside was so heavy. Inabot ko ang cellphone ko para sana tingnan ang oras. It was still ten in the morning but the sky was so gloomy.

The first person I thought of was Summer.

Dali-dali akong tumayo at nagtungo sa banyo. I need to be very fast. She's alone, and she might be very scared right now.

It just took me minutes to prepare myself. Nagdala ako ng dalawang jacket at damit dahil paniguradong mababasa ko patungo roon sa lakas ng ulan. Pati na rin isang kumot. I'm planning to spent the rest of the day with Summer until the storm passed by.

Pagkababa ko ay si manang agad na naglilinis sa sala ang naabutan ko.

"Manang, pwede po bang makahiram ng flashlight?"

Manang looked at my way with disbelief, then she looked at my things.

"Mali ata ang desiyon mo anak na magcamping lalo pa't may bagyo. Naku! Ikaw talagang bata ka kung ano-ano na lang yang pumapasok sa isip mo," sabi ni manang habang nakapamaywang. Lumapit ako sa kaniya.

"Balak ko po sanang doon muna kina Summer. Baka doon na rin ako matulog. Hanggat hindi humuhupa ang bagyo." Nalukot ang mukha ni manang sa narinig.

"Maben naman--"

"Manang, don't worry. I will be fine. Please. Can you just lend me a flashlight and an umbrella?" Ngumiwi si manang.

"Aynaku! Wag mo nga akong iniingles at di kita maintindihan. O siya, nasa silong ang malaking plaslayt at andoon naman sa labas ang payong. Teka lang at ipagbabalot kita ng makakain niyo."

Napangiti na lang ako habang naglalakad na palayo si manang. Isang napakalas na kulog na naman ang nagpabalik sa aking diwa. I am so worried right now.

I hurriedly went to the basement to get the flashlight and then went to the kitchen for the food. Hindi ko na pinatapos pa si manang at dali-dali ko ng binitbit ang mga pinaglagyan niya ng kung ano mang pagkain. I kissed her temple before I went on my way.

Lakad-takbo ang ginawa ko. I'm doing my best to be there the earlier. Kahit na nakapayong ay basang-basa pa rin ako ng ulan. But I don't care anymore. What's important right now is to be there as soon as possible, 'cause I know how scared Summer is right now.

Nang matanaw ko ang pulang gate ay dali-dali ko ng tinakbo ito.

"Summer!" I shouted the moment I stepped in the house. However, I got no response.

"Summer, asan ka?!" Damn! I am so worried right now. Dumadagdag pa sa kaba ko ang malalakas na kulog at kidlat sa labas. The house was dark. Binaba ko na ang dala ko pagkarating sa sala.

"Summer?!" I shouted once again.

I looked at the kitchen, at the backyard, and at any place here that she could be in, but there was no trace of her.

"Summer, if you're playing with me, please stop it already because I am so damn worried right now!"

Still, there was no response.

God, what might did happen? Sobrang bilis ng pagtibok ng puso ko. I was so frustrated! Napatingin ako sa ikalawang palapag ng bahay. She might be in one of the rooms.

Tinakbo ko ang hagdan at pinasok ang bawat kuwarto. Sa tagal ko nang pabalik-balik dito, ngayon ko lang nagawang pasukin ang mga kuwartong nasa ikalawang palapag.

There were 5 rooms. The first 4 rooms were nothing special. They were literally empty, but this 5th room at the very end of the hallway got my attention. Hindi gaya ng nauna ng mga kuwarto, this one is still complete. Sa lahat ng parte ng bahay na ito, ito lang 'yung sinadyang iwanan na para bang may maninirahan pa rin dito, although it looked old already.

Inilibot ko ang tingin ko sa kuwarto. Kupas na ang kayumanggi at puting pintura ng kuwarto. Maalikabok na rin ang mga muwebles pero nasa ayos pa rin ang mga ito. There was spider's web all over the roof. Halatang sira na rin ang napakalaking kulay puting kabinet. May isang malaking kama ang nasa gitna na sa palibot nito ay may nakaharang na mga kurtina. Everything was in place, as if it was preserved. But of them all, the big painting attracted me more. It was a painting of a girl in a white dress. It was a painting of a very beautiful girl who has a brown curly hair that perfectly matches her sparkling pair of brown eyes, and a fair but pinkish skin, so far from her pale complexion right now. It was a painting of an alive Summer.

I stared at it as if it was the world. She was so beautiful. She was a goddess. How I wish I met her the earlier. How I wish I know the whole story. Summer, who are you really?

I was awakened from my deep thought by the lightning. Shit. Si Summer nga pala. I ran at the doorway. I was about to go out when a soft broken voice called out my name.

"Maven."

It was Summer, and she was crying...again. Takot akong lingunin siya. Takot akong makita siyang umiiyak na naman. Takot akong makita siyang nasasaktan what ever the thing that made her broken right now. Of all the times I've heard her crying, this one felt excruciating. This tells the saddest unspoken words.

"Maven, alam ko na. A-alam ko na ang rason... nang pagkamatay ko."