tides ○ a collection of poems

xxxiii. skinny

They told me to hate my body as what it is,
to tear it apart, to change it,
and to pour all my soul, my spirit in doing so

I know that society doesn't see bones
sticking out of skin as beautiful,
or arms thin enough to grab around them with your single hand,
and neither do I.

But I don't remember if I hate my body because they told me to or because
I hate it

And yes, I know, it is badly unhealthy
to be like this
But I did everything,
and when I say everything, I mean
e v e r y t h i n g
to change my flesh.

All I see when I look into the mirror
Is a girl that has been told
To hate herself no matter what
By the people she thought she could trust.

I have learned, that yes, being skinny is all a girl should ever want to be,
But being underweight is something to be ashamed of.