Perceive

My First Kill...This Time On Purpose.

Alex had three faithful people in his posse. I didn't know their names. I never tried to find out. Me and Gia would call them Things One Two and Three respectively. I'd killed Thing Two bymistake.
Things One and Three really didn't like me. I was pretty sure they were going to tie me up, because they had fifty shades of mommy issues. But turns out they wanted to play corner the animal. I was game, I knew I could take them out clean, they could pump as many as muscles they wanted. They had brains the size of bacteria. They wouldn't win this. I just needed enough from Alex to back my story up. And for Adrian to stay in the damn van. I had a gut feeling, that the boy was planning on jumping in. There's no way we'd win if he did that. I just hope he'd devoleped enough tactical sense and ofcourse trust in me to stay put.
They circled me like vultures, now I know, they're all big bulky Italians, but they didn't know how to speak any. So if you were thinking that I was going to get abused in Italian...nope...good old fashioned English. Made it easier for me turn it into a joke anyway.
For me to look beautiful in Alex's eyes, I needed to shirk off the glasses. Wow, what a pain. I could barely see. I was completely reliant on instinct. I needed them to come close and talk to me. But that's it. Any further and I knew I'd flip.
Thing one tried to come close to me. He was usually the one who'd hold Alex's girls down. Thing three on the other hand was specially meant and only meant to provide an extra pleasure booster to Alex. A back door entry of sorts if you know what I mean.
I let Thing One pin me to the wall. I could feel Alex, breathing right behind me. My skin was already starting to crawl. The next ten minutes were blurry to me. Dammit, I knew I'd flip. But this time I didn't physically hurt anyone.
It was like a wave, of thoughts. They weren't mine. The thoughts, emotions, none of it belonged to me. It was almost as if when I looked into Alex's eyes, I could see what he'd done. Not only to me, to countless, faceless women and children over the years. But I needed him to confess. So I looked deeper. I switched my focus from the room and turned it solely to him. I looked him in the eye, and we both knew in that one instant, that I couldn't lose my focus. I had to remind him, I had to make sure that he spoke the words to describe what he'd done. So I kept invading his mind, deeper and deeper till I was able to see how the bastard, could justify what he'd done.
Asshole, thought he was a psychopath. He's not really encountered me yet now, has he?
Everything sound around me switched to a buzz. A hum. It was only me and his mind. It was filthy. But there was a shred of remorse. Ofcourse, any show of such emotion would result in painful torture followed by death. But he loved his sister. Loved her enough, that when he realised that she wasn't dead, he let her escape. He hated me. With every fiber of his being. Of course, he did. I was everything he was supposed to be. His father even, thought I would be the biggest asset to the Cianti family. Not him. He was not left to die in that coma, purely because they hadn't given up hunting me down. But they had to keep their operations down to a minimum. Their daughter had passed away. They at least had to make it look like they cared.
Alex had been guilty for a long time. I could still turn him to my side. Or so I thought. I said to him quietly in his ear," You can still leave, inspite of everything. There is still a shred of soul and remorse in you. Don't waste it. Go find Gia. She'll forgive you. Not immediately, but it will happen. You leave Alex. Leave now, and you'll be free, permanently".
" It's too late for me. Sides, I'd rather die, than go back to that backstabbing traitor. She's a Cianti, she should've been strong enough. Dad's right. We have no place for cowards. She is better off dead. But you're also right about one more thing. I hate what I have turned into. I particularly wanted you back to make you finish what you started. But I need to give a good struggle for upstairs. Try to do it quickly, I'm tired".
He looked broken. The only way he could see to freedom, was death. The ultimate freedom. I could see his point. He looked tired, exhausted and drained. The overcompensating pride of the Cianti family, had failed to thrive in him. For better or worse, Gia's death had broken him completely. He knew what had happened to her before her suicide. He'd made sure those people suffered. He was a tortured human, not so much of a monster anymore.
I snapped him out of his trance. He'd said more than enough for the bugs and the upstairs audience. Time to spring into action.
I head butted Thing One and kicked Thing three in the face at the same time. I looked at Alex and gave him my final command," End it,enough is enough, you will not feel anything anymore!"
He took the dagger in his sleeve and slit his carotid with it. As he lay there dying, the two of those other idiots were so scared, they took off running and screaming," Donna diavolo!!!! Strega!!!!"( Devil woman, witch!) Well they did know Italian, surprised me again.
Now that was always the kind of response I was looking for, but this was attracting undue attention.
I was about to take off, when I heard Alex calling me.
" Cassandra, I have always loved your name. I think I did really love you. Even that day, I don't think I could stomach to hurt you like that. But you, always so impulsive. Did you never, even once, see me as an equal? What was wrong Cassandra? I could've run with you guys. My sister, hates me. My parents, think I'm a failure. Why Cass? I followed all the rules. I made your life hell, yet nothing was enough. I know Gia's alive. I figured that long time ago. Don't worry, no one's ever going to look for her. Cassandra........."
With that, he finally closed his eyes. He'd never looked so peaceful to me. I would never forgive him, but I wouldn't hate him so much anymore.