Why

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Y/N

I got discharged from the hospital today

and I'm taking a day off from school only for today, but later on I still have to go back. I feel tired..almost as if all the weight on my shoulders doubled and I couldn't move..

As i lay in bed with my arm resting on my forehead.. I started to think about everything that happended the other day

'why were they crying'

'Why didn't I just die''

'why couldn't I move'

'why did I let them in'

'why did I say yes'

'why did Jaemin care'

Questions began to come in as tears were too..

I never wanted this to happen..if I just said no to Haechan's offer would they have noticed me either way? I feel so out of place when I'm with them..But at the same time I finally felt love and care.. I was so despreate to have Jaemin that I would say yes to anything that could get me close to him without thinking about the consequences, I should just face the fact that he would never like a girl like me..I'm nothing compared to Hina. I'm not good enough for him, she is.

I want to run into someones arms , so they could tell me that I'll be alright even though I know this isn't something easy to fix.

"Mom.." tears started coming

"*sob* I miss you.." I couldn't hold on anymore, so I let go of all my emotions screaming like I was dying. It felt like hell..

After a few minutes I calmed down and got up from my bed to wash my face.. for some reason after getting all my emotions out I felt relief

I thought of finally going to my mom, to finally see her after so many years of hiding..

-

"Sometimes emotions come to play and tricks you into thinking you're fine"

Alone  //Na Jaemin//Where stories live. Discover now