Thoughts

To Help

I want to help, but I don't know how.

I want to help, but I am invisible through a screen.

I want to help, but nobody's awake.

I want to help, but I am afraid.

My friend, I want to help you. If I had my licence, I swear I would be there in an instant. It doesn't matter that it's 3:00 am, I swear by my own heart that I will be there. 

The lights of my room mock me as I think of you, sitting alone and staring into darkness in more ways than one. I can't understand the urge to feel pain or to be gone from this world. But what I can understand is the darkness. After all, I've had my fair share of it too. I know how some days seem to be endless, while others go by in the blink of an eye. I know how a single hour will drag by, while all the others are just a moment in time. I know how it feels to forget everything good and yet remember every single detail of one bad day, and vice versa. I know the feeling of "coming down" from a day with friends and feeling like shit the next day. I know.

So I'm here. And I care about and love you to pieces, even if I seem distant.