Atelophobia (Kellic)

6

Dinner with Vic was over a week ago by now and time was moving faster than I wanted it to. He had sat next to me in history again and I hadn't felt as uncomfortable with him watching me draw this time. Even Tony had held himself back, but I could still feel him glaring at me all the time. Vic probably talked to him again about the previous incident. Besides that, Vic and I mostly just smiled at each other if we crossed paths in school, nothing more nothing less. Justin and Jesse didn't get off my back after I told them about that evening though and it was annoying me to no end. It's not like it was a date or changed anything. I wouldn't really consider us friends just because we talked a few times, let alone dating. But Justin and Jesse had a very different opinion on that.

However, I really wasn't in the mood for it. The day had been ruined the minute I opened my eyes and it didn't get any better. As I got up I saw my mom fast asleep on the couch while I had to worry what Kaily and Nick could eat for breakfast. Our fridge was empty as always. And mom didn't care...as always. I had to take care of these kind of things for a while now and most of the time I didn't mind, but this day was different. It bugged me. It truly did. I usually didn't question my life, I gave up on that a long time ago and just realized that it was easier to accept how things were. However, Kaily and Nick noticed that something was off with my mood but didn't mention it. I didn't have the heart to lie to them, but I wouldn't have been able to tell them the truth either. I was just glad they didn't know about it and I was going to keep it that way.

Justin knew about it. He greeted me with a very careful smile, pity written all over his face. Jess didn't really know what was wrong, but Justin probably told him to be a little more sensitive around me that day. And I hated it. I hated that date, I hated the situation, I hated the memories. But there was nothing I could do about it. What happened, happened. There was no denying it.

I gave my friends the best smile I could muster, even though neither of them were buying it. Understandably. I looked horrible. I haven't exactly had the best beauty sleep, so my eyes were surrounded by dark circles, which stood out against my pale skin. They had treated me like a raw egg the whole day, making me fume on the inside. For instance, as we sat in the cafeteria during lunch it was awfully quiet between us. I knew that Jesse felt extremely uncomfortable so he started to talk about the girl he had met a few weeks ago.

"I went out with Ashley again yesterday. We went to the movies, like we got popcorn and soda and stuff, and we had these really good seats. Usually I always sit more in the front but she wanted to sit in the back and at first I didn't think much about it but we sat down and they were really comfortable. But I guess if you have to sit there for about two hours the chairs should be comfortable. Could you imagine the pain you'd feel if you would sit in really uncomfortable seats for a whole movie, with all the commercials at first. God, that would suck. Why are those commercials so long anyway, it's not like you already paid for the movie and food, which already is a lot, but why do they also need extra money for playing commercials? The food is so expensive, even though it's not even that good. And in general, to pay for a movie and sit in seats thousands of people before you have sat before just seems stupid especially if you consider how much more comfortable your own couch is but for some reason it's considered romantic and-"

Jesse stopped all of a sudden and looked at the both of us, before lowering his head and mumbling a small 'sorry'.

"It's fine, Jesse. Did you have a good time?"

Jesse smiled at me. "Yeah, it was great." He looked at Justin who raised his eyebrows at him. Then Jess looked back at me in panic. "I mean, not great great. It's not like you have to spend money to have a good time or as a matter of fact even go on a date, you can obviously have fun all on your own and can someone please just tell me what's going on, I'm losing my mind here."