Adjustment of Attitude

Part 3

Evan approachs me with the tray. He pushs it toward me and I lift the glass, noting the decent pour of scotch.

"Would you like me to prepare the cigar for you Mistress, or would you prefer the task?"

"Please prepare if for me." I reply and walk over to warm myself at the fire pit.

Garrett motions to the seat beside him. "Join me?"

"I think I'll stand." The edge in my voice can't hidden. Even knowing I should watch my steps in this setting, I can't back down to the challenge I feel brewing inside.

"You missed a beautiful sunset." Garrett says, acting as if my move of dominance doesn't phase him and isn't enough to be noticed. "You've missed quite a few as of late. A pity. With such a beautiful view all around you and to make choices not to admire it."

"I understand how nature feels." I reply, my tone flat.

To my left, Evan approaches with a perfectly lit cigar. "Your cigar, Mistress."

"Thank you. Your service is marvelous and appreciated, my dear boy."

Evan nods, steps back and settle into an observation position should we need anything else.

The air hangs thick with tension and my feet refuse to stand still. Crashing waves below, call to my sense of restlessness and I make my way over to the balcony rail. The coolness of the night brushes against my skin and I shiver. With a long draw, I pull the cigar smoke into my mouth. The flavor surrounds my tongue and a thousand memories flooded my mind, as I savor the deep rich flavor of the smoke. In front of me the easy rhythm of the surf below lulls me into a strange melancholy.

"It's easy to forget your a switch." Garrett says from behind me, startling me out of my own thoughts, causing me to turn and face him. "You are competent and capable, both in work and within our household. Command exudes from you the minute you enter a room. A look from you can send many skittering without a word. Without effort you intimidate those who lack the confidence to challenge you. It is easy for me to forget your depth of needs runs just as dark and wide on the submissive side. Both are as natural to you as breathing. The ability to move between the edges of them is amazing to watch."

"I am whatever the world needs me to be. A chameleon who can lift and move the worlds around me no matter the cost. We both know people rarely need or want me to be in one of those modes." I turn my back towards him and stare out over the water. The ocean breeze picks up and my body reacts in the cold.

Behind me Garrett's steps closer and surrounds my body with his. With a slight lean forward he pins me against the balcony rail and lowers his head until his lips just touches my ears.

"I'm sorry we've failed you. We are in this spot, with the need for today's vote because of our failure. We are also here because you no longer trust us with the other side of you. Yours is a darker need. It is not something a word or inconsistent command, satisfies. It doesn't rise to the top just because one bids it to do so. It is something which internally and externally conflicts with the self you project to the greater world and society while you try to obtain the unobtainable,"perfect" image of what it is to be a woman. Yet, once you trusted us with it because we'd earned it. This weekend, we step back on the road- not to eradicate the beautiful dominant woman you are but to find a balance with her dark submissive counterpart, which few will ever have the privilege to know."

His words assault the cascade of thoughts pouring through my head. Every perspective I held shifts. The solid footing in which I indignantly sat mere moments ago loosens in the wake of his words.