State of Confusion (Doctor Who Fanfic)

Prologue

PROLOGUE

(ref: Series 2 "Fear Her")

Wandering down the center of a dark street always had a strange sort of appeal the Doctor never could put his finger precisely on.  Maybe just because it was not the appropriate way or time to be walking down the street.  He'd never been one for conventionality.  Or rules.  Once upon a time, age had made him wiser than his younger, rebellious self.  But then he'd overcompensated in the opposite direction.  It hadn't taken him long to learn that too many rules and regulations made for a very boring existence.  But it had taken a few lifespans to find the balance.  The important rules were important.  But sometimes, it felt good just to break a few of the harmless ones.

Another success.  Not that he'd really had too much concern about this one.  Just a simple matter of getting one lonely child back home.  Another notch in his belt - people he'd been able to help, lives he'd made a difference in.  It was a good feeling.  An ecstatic feeling, actually.  Beaming as he wandered down the street with his hands in his pockets, he drew in the night air - all of the complex, mingling scents of twenty-first century Earth.  A fire in someone's fireplace - no, wait, summer.  Barbecue? - and sulphur from the fireworks overhead.  Roses in a garden and hairspray from the woman who passed him walking in the other direction, hand in hand with a man about her own age. 

Every night should feel this perfect.

"Cake?"

Recognizing the voice, he turned with a smile.  He didn't have to say a word.  He didn't have to explain what had happened, why it was wonderful, how it had felt to save the world - well, maybe not the world, but two lonely, lost children and it had certainly been their world.  Rose already knew all of that.  She always seemed to know.  She laughed at the strangest of times - just like he did.  She smiled when he smiled, she put her mind to work when he did.  And for a human, her mind was brilliant.

Just now, she was joining in the laughter that seemed to come right up out of his gut, from that part of him that felt, more than anything, that life was worth living.  In moments like these, all the pains and sorrows of nine- hundred-some-odd years couldn't pull that smile from his face.

Cake.  What a beautiful, glorious thing.  He took a bite and savored it, well aware of her smile.  She was just as full of joy and life as he was.  She was happy.  He was happy.  All was well with the universe.

"I can't stress this enough.  Ball bearings you can eat? Masterpiece!"

She was still smiling when the flicker of worry crossed her eyes.  He wasn't alarmed.  He'd been expecting it.  The same way he was expecting it when her arms circled around his neck, clinging tightly.  He returned the embrace, let her feel the relief and move past it. 

"I thought I'd lost you."

"Nah, not on a night like this."  He withdrew, still smiling.  "This is a night for lost things being found." 

As quickly as it had come, her relief turned back to a relaxed, happy smile.  He had to hand it to her, she knew how to live in the moment.  It made her more compatible with the sort of life he led than just about anyone he'd ever met.

"Come on."

Still holding the cupcake in one hand, he slipped his other hand into his pocket as he turned and led a meandering pace down the dark, shadowed road.  There was excitement in the air, and it somehow made him feel even more alive.  Smiling, he looked up at the sky, at the masterpiece that time had created and that somehow - beyond reason - he was here to protect.  Well, maybe that was stretching it a bit.  Last of the Time Lords or not, maybe he couldn't protect the universe.  But this little corner of it, at least, was his.  It was as close as he could come to a second home.  This little planet called Earth - tiny and so insignificant, and yet unbelievably beautiful in all its potential and creativity.