eighteen

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Three Years Ago

"Oh God, what is it?" I cross my arms and raise an eyebrow at him.

"It's a surprise!" Ross laughs.

I fall back on his bed dramatically and groan.

"You know how I feel about surprises!"  I protest. He shakes his head and sits down by me.

"Just go with it," He pleads and leans down to kiss me sweetly. I can't help smiling at that.

"Stay here. I'll be back in a second."

"What do you mean?"

"I might've hidden it." He shrugs and flashes a playful grin, then backs out of the door.

I listen to his footsteps echo down the hallway, then spring up off the bed.

I open his closet doors and start searching through his stuff.

The last time he'd tried to surprise me, I had caught him planning it in a little blue notebook that he had tried to inconspicuously throw in the closet.

I have no idea where he put it, but I know it has to be somewhere he wouldn't think of me to look.

I search through a set of drawers in the corner of his closet. There are tons of notebooks and sketchbook, but none of them are even blue!

I let out a frustrated sigh and move to the next drawer. There's a shoebox with a sticky note stuck to the top of the box.

Messy hand writing is on the sticky note. It says "Colburn," and a date is written on it from next week.

Who or what is Colburn?

I know I should just leave it alone, but now I'm too curious to.

After all, Ross would just tell me if I asked, wouldn't he? He trusts me.

I lift the lid of the box carefully and peek inside. Sitting in the box are three plastic bags of what almost looks like... weed.

I'm not about to jump to conclusions, though. Maybe it's.. oregano or something stupid like that. Ross wouldn't be affiliating himself with drugs. He's too smart for that.

I set the box down by the closet door and wait for him to come back.

He returns, holding something behind his back. A playful grin tugged at his lips.

"Close your eyes," He directs and I roll my eyes before closing them.

He shifts and suddenly his arms are around me. I can feel his hand on the back of my neck as he moves my hair to the side.

Something tiny and cool to the touch is placed on my skin.

"Ok, you can open them now." His body moves away from mine and I open my eyes. I look down at the silver chain around my neck.

Hanging from the chain is a tiny charm of the letter R. I smile and look back at him.

"Thank you," I breathe in awe. His smile brightens and he pulls a necklace out from under his shirt. Hanging from his is the letter C.

"I wasn't sure if you were gonna think this was super cheesy-" He starts, but I laugh and cut him off.

"It's cheesy as hell, but that doesn't mean I don't love it," I promise him. He beams again and leans forward, pulling my face towards his until our lips meet.

I break our kiss a moment later and gaze at him. He smiles right back.

He's just so happy to be here.

My eyes wander to the floor and I see the box. It quickly reminds me to ask him.

"Hey Ross?" I look back at him.

"Yeah?"

"Who's Colburn?" I ask. Something passes over his face, like some sort of realization. It sets back to his usual half smile. 

"No idea, why?"

"It's on that box," I explain and point at it. He turns to look at it and picks it up.

"This thing?" He examines it with a shrug. "I think it belonged to the landlord."

"I thought the landlord got all their stuff out already. You've owned this house for a while."

"Maybe they forgot it." He gets up and puts the box on the top shelf in a corner. "I'll see if I can call them tomorrow," He tells me.

"Sure," I agree, satisfied with that solution. He closes the closet door and sits down in front of me again, closer this time so that our knees touch.

He flashes his mischievous grin at me again.

"What?" His smiles spreads to mine as I try to catch on to the secret brewing in his head.

Without warning, he cups my face kisses me again. I take longer this time to enjoy the electricity between us.

I slide my fingers through his soft hair and he pulls me closer into his arms.

In that moment, we are still crazy kids in love. I hope it never changes.

***
Present Day

Colburn, I think to myself.

Could that have been one of his customers? What if that was the guy he worked for?

I was an idiot. I just followed him blindly and never questioned it.

How could I let myself do that again?

I sigh and look around the empty house.

It's always so lonely.

It's frustrating to admit, but I miss him.

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