Lonely

1

Baby, I'm hoping and praying

My knees weak, I'm shaking

'Cause you know, that I always needed saving

Now I'm fucking lonely and you didn't want me

Trying to show me, that you didn't own me

But all you do is leave me fucking lonely

Knees on the concrete, cut up and bleeding

For no Goddamn reason

But all you do is leave me fucking lonely

Demi

He wasn't home yet, Wilmer was supposed to be here an hour ago and still nothing. Not even a text to tell me he would be late for dinner. I sat at the table staring at the empty seat across from me. I sighed and stabbed the lettuce of my grilled chicken salad not really hungry anymore. After a few more minutes I gave up on him coming home and took my plate to the trash scraping the remnants of the salad off. I washed my plate and put dinner away going to take a shower

I went to the master bathroom after grabbing some pajamas. I turned the faucet and watched the water hit the wall. After it got to the steamy temperature I liked it at I stepped in a breath leaving my lips as the water cascaded over my skin. I did my usual routine of washing and conditioning my hair before washing my body. Once I finished I turned the shower off and got out, steam rolling off my skin due to the temperature change. I towel dried my body then put on my shorts and one of Wilmer's shirts. I brushed my long dark brown hair and put it in a ponytail before heading to the room we shared. I checked my phone once again....nothing. I climbed into bed and curled up sighing that my husband wasn't home.

*^*

I had fallen asleep when I woke up I heard footsteps and saw his figure walking through the doorway. "Hey.." I said simply my voice raspy from having just woken up, I was still upset that he hadn't told me he would be home late. I propped myself up on my elbows as he walked to his dresser "Hi Hermosa" he said with a small smile. "Why didn't you tell me you'd be late?" I asked him softly. He looked at me taking off his button up shirt putting on an old t-shirt from college "I know I'm sorry the business meeting ended later than I thought and I just I'm sorry, I should've called." He said before climbing into bed pulling me close. I looked at him and sighed nodding "Okay just....try to call next time." I stated simply before curling up beside him, my head on his chest. He nodded "I will." Before long I heard his breathing even out and knew he was asleep.

I slipped out of bed and went to my studio that was in the basement and sat at my piano dragging my fingers across the black and white keys slowly before playing a melody words from a song I was writing leaving my lips

Bad at love, no, I'm not good at this

But I can't say Im innocent

Not hardly, but I'm sorry

And all my friends, they know and it's true

I don't know who I am without you

I got it bad, baby

Got it bad

Oh, tell me you love me

I need someone on days like this, I do

And I hope I never see the day

That you move on and be happy without me

Without me

Whats my hand without your heart to hold?

I dont know what I'm living for

If Im living without you

As the last few lines left my lips my voice began to crack a wave of emotion crashing over me. I felt like I was losing him, we talked less and less, touched less and it felt as though we weren't even married anymore just strangers living together. I let the tears fall as I sat my hands still on the keys. I couldn't lose him I had to fight for this marriage I was tired of sitting back letting it deuterate before my eyes not trying to save it.

*^*

"Baby wake up"

I mumbled something before my arm hit a piano key startling me and I jerked awake hissing as I felt a kink in my neck. I rubbed it blinking a few times before seeing a concerned Wilmer by my side. "Why weren't you in bed?" Wilmer asked looking to me. "I had a sudden inspiration to write so I did until about 5 am.." I said looking to the pad of paper on the piano. He sighed nodding "Alright...Come on let's get some breakfast before I take you to the studio." He said. He was a producer at the record label I was signed with which was convenient. I nodded and patted upstairs and began making breakfast for the both of us as I sighed looking to Wilmer. "Wil....we need to talk" I stated as I stood over the stove. I turned to see him nodding "Yeah we do" he responds. I swallowed the lump that formed in my throat as he shifted uncomfortably what was he gonna do? Or say?

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Sorry the first part is short but I promise the next will be longer and filled with more details and background on their relationship.