Incubus

Chapter 21

"If you want to be happy, be"

~Leo Tolstoy

There is nothing prettier than a city in the early morning, with the sun beginning to rise over the skyscrapers in the cold wind. In fact, I could even remember what the countryside looked like in the mornings. I had always loved waking up to the snow falling, or the sun shining over the trees. But my fondest memory of the countryside had to be, being able to wake up extremely early and then step outside just after a rainstorm had been raging on all night. That was when the air was frigid and you could still smell the rain in the air, feel the wetness of the grass. How fresh everything seemed when you inhaled that air; it seemed to wash out the evil from your lungs. That was my favorite moment.

In truth, nothing could compare to the countryside, especially if you grew up living there. But what would life be, if you couldn't at least try to find beauty in everything? And if not everything, then at least some things. I knew I wouldn't be living life if I only saw how corrupt everything is. That was one of the only things that my mother told me that I to which I still held on.

As I stared out the window, for the first time since I had moved to the state of New York, I began to realize that I missed the country more than ever. I grabbed the phone and dialed Emmalyn's number. After my tantrum on the phone with her the other day, she'd called me back as soon as I got back to my apartment, apologizing for the error of her ways. It seemed after the haze of alcohol stopped clouding her judgment, she realized how insensitive she'd been to me. 

"Hello?" Emmalyn's voice sounded tired as if she hadn't gotten over the hangover she had received two days ago.

"Hey, Em," I said. "Can we talk?" 

All of the grumblings seemed to fade when she heard the distinct wobble in my voice.

"Of course, is everything all right?"

"I don't know. I woke up, and couldn't fall asleep, so I went downstairs to make myself a cup of tea. I'm cold. And I still can't fall back to sleep."

"Did you have one of your bad dreams again?" she sounded worried. "I can come over if you would like me to."

"No! It's okay; I just need someone to talk to. I think I'm homesick."

"And it only took you this long," she muttered. "I'm surprised you even miss that place at all, seeing how eager you were to leave it all behind. Do you actually miss the place itself, or what you used to have there? Because there is a distinction between the two."

I rolled my eyes, wiping away a forming tear. "Don't start using your sociology class to try and understand me."

"That's not what sociology is, Rin! I'm surprised at your ignorance since I've been interested in the subject since I first took it my freshman year in high school-' but her voice faltered as if she remembered of the falling-out we had had during that time. High school didn't hold the best memories for the both of us, especially when it came to our relationship. We hadn't spoken to each other for the remainder of high school until after graduation when I had finally realized what an ass I had been to abandon her.