Barry Allen imagines

Control

Sitting at the desk in the cortex Cisco was quickly rambling stuff to Barry over the intercom. Barry was on another mission and a hard one at that he was struggling but their was nothing we could do until he got back. "I'm on my way back I lost him." Barry panted and within seconds he was stumbling into the cortex with blood on his face and trailed on his suit.

Aware of the sudden danger to his health I shot up at of my seat and over to his assistants "Barry? You okay?" I asked slowly walking closer to help his fallen posture. He tried nodding slowly but instead his eyes rolled to the back of his head and his body dropped to the floor "Barry!" I shouted.

***
It wasn't long until he was awake and we'd both made our way back to our apartment. He sat on the sofa while I stood pacing the length of the room we were sat in "I can't keep sitting around! You need my help out there." I ranted coming to a stop to see his reaction.

"No, Y/N you made me promise no matter what I'd never let you out into the practical work." He disagreed frowning deeply with worry covering his face. I sighed moving to sit next to him on the sofa "you never told me why you don't fight." He said more of a question then a statement.

I lifted my head to create eye contact with the green eyed man. "Because of what I am." I said quietly my voice breaking slightly. "I hurt people, I kill people and I have." I added letting a slow tear rolled down my cold face.

Grabbing my hands in his he rubbed his thumb over mine in comfort. "I'm a monster, I don't want to be this person, I can't be this person." I cried letting a whimper out of my mouth. "I don't fight because I know am the only one who would win. I know I'd loose control and nobody would ever stand a chance a bringing me back." I finished going to stand up and moving over to the corridor to leave to my room.

"Then what's kept you in check for this long?" He asked standing up as well moving closer to me.

"Something that's not mine, something I could never have." I answered turning to smile weakly at him before turning my back on him again to finish my sentence "you." Barry gulped hard looking down at his shoes sadly. "And I know that you don't want me it's Iris and it's always has been always will be."

He tilted his head as his eyes got glassy with tears "Y/N I care about you, I do, but I love Iris." He told me his voice not so strong at the thought of hurting his friend "I'm sorry." He apologised shaking his head as he clenched his jaw angry at himself.

"I think I'm going to go for the night." I commented picking up my jacket and keys for the small coffee table "I just need some time."

Just as I opened the door to leave Barry stopped me "how much time?" He asked me not looking into my eyes.

"Enough to get over you."

***
Okay so it's sort and not so sweet sorry guys! But yeah I know it's been a while but no am not dead thanks for putting up with my writing.

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