Scrutinize

cztery

I was born to make mistakes, not to fake perfection.  - Drake

Spirits, or whatever you call them and me, are actually quite friendly.

There are others like me, and we'll wave at each other and smile and all that stuff when we see each other. No matter what they did in their life, whether they were a murderer and on America's Most Wanted list or a Nobel Peace Prize winner, all that was forgotten when we became what we are today.

And I meant to say what, because we technically are 'whats,' not 'whos.'

The boy, actually named Brennan, who befriended Jane, came over to my house yesterday. I think she really likes him. He and Jane played some soccer out in the backyard while Eleanor sat out there and drew the scene. She loves art a whole lot, so much that she wants to hang in a museum someday.

I have no doubt she will. I just don't know where or when or for what painting. Maybe it will be that one. I can't predict nor tell the future.

Mum went back to her accounting job today. She had received a month off of work for my death. I'm glad she went back. It will take her mind off of me and Pop, at least for a little while.

Pop is alright. He got a few cuts and bruises from the battlefield, but other than that, he's alright. Or, at least, he's trying to make everyone and himself believe he is. He isn't. Anyone who is anyone can see that.

I met a few whats today. I met my grandfather who died when I was four years old. He was nice, and my parents were right. I do look a lot like him. Or, did, I guess. He looks younger than he did when he died, and I went and visited him in the hospital hours before his death. He was just as funny and perky as when I met him.

I also met God, or Allah, or whatever you call the higher power than spirits and humans, today. He was very nice, the most selfless and nicest God you would ever think of. He and I talked for a while, about how he was and how hard it must be to watch every single living thing in the universe and not. He just laughed and ruffled my hair, saying that it wasn't too hard to watch everything when they were basically a part of him. We also talked about my life and my siblings and Zane and everyone that I left behind.

I told him I was sorry.