Is happiness just in your head? If you think about it, YOU have to choose to be happy. For me i don't know how to be. There is different types of happiness as there is different types of depression, you can either be just upset because of something or actually diagnosed with it, it controlling your life. So you can either feel somewhat happy where you are laughing and with people or you can feel Happy, when you forget about everything, just breathe and be yourself. Time just stops for you.
I have felt happy before. Moderetly a lot. I was happy when i was at my dads house. No one from school would judge me there my dad was so nice and loveable, i forgot about all of my struggles for just a couple days. It felt amazing and i miss it so much. Now I'm older and my dad doesn't even text me. I feel as if I'm stuck in this loop that will never let me be free. I get hurt and I'm breaking day after day.
Yes, my friends make me happy and I'm lucky to not have it worse. But I'm not happy. I don't love myself. I feel like life is a punishment. We feel this way. But nothing is happening to make it stop. It is all in our heads, we are in control. We need to help ourselves. Before it's too late. I love you.
~smolbluebean xo

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My Life
Non-FictionHiya! So I thought maybe just maybe my life might be interesting enough to read about. I don't know why but I thought maybe this is how I can express my emotions and other thoughts out into a place where people might see it. Anyway, if no one sees i...