Who Names The Colors

The Deep

July 2014

After that night, Jo started running. Literally. She took up running to sublimate some of the pulsing red energy that started when Harry made eye contact with her while making himself come.

Well, started when he came in wearing that green shirt and revolutionized her mental picture of him. Also, she had missed having time to think while her feet pounded the pavement rhythmically. It gave her lots of time to ruminate over all the ways she was very very bad for fantasizing about her son's mate. He was the same age as her son.

Her grown son, a voice whispered. Shut up, she would say to the little red clad woman on her shoulder. Harry was too nice of a boy and deserved a girl his own age. He was way too mature for most people his age, the wicked little bitch intoned. She was fooling herself anyway, he wasn't interested. The response there was not a voice, but a picture of his smirk when he saw her look at his perky nips, or his own stare at her exposed thighs, or most damning, his face when he came. When he came as he looked into her eyes.

Today's run was less successful than others.

Wisely, she had run away in other ways as well. A little more figuratively. She had secured a new babysitter for Zoe. One who was still in college, female, and great with Zoe. Bonus that the thought of her didn't make Jo feel like she was sitting on an orange. Audrey watched out for Zoe and was big on play. It didn't take that long for Zoe to stop asking for Harry.

Another mixed blessing was that after his long weeks home for Christmas and New Year's, Ethan stayed at school for most of winter and spring. This was a thing she was both thankful for and resented, like good advice not taken. It meant she only saw him through a screen, but it also meant that she didn't have to face Harry. She remedied the situation by taking him on a proper holiday during a reading week. They went to Mallorca which seemed like a nice bridge between her wish for Barcelona and his for Ibiza. Ethan was happy at the beaches, went out to clubs at night, and she didn't nag the night he didn't come home.

At home, after the interlude, she guessed you could call it, with Harry, she had been unable to sleep and had snuck upstairs and slept on Zoe's floor with the blanket and pillow she kept there for teething or sick nights. Her eyes had drooped and she'd slept so deeply that she remembered none of her dreams. She supposed that was optimal, she was afraid they would be full of spring greens, sunlight, and vibrant pinks. Her dreams the nights following were full of her either chasing or being chased through jungles, but since his hues were the inspiration, she only saw suggestions of him. He was camouflaged.

The next morning, Ethan found her on Zoe's carpet and accepted her excuse for the bags under her eyes. It seemed obvious enough that the toddler was responsible for the disruption to her sleeping arrangement.

"Harry's gone home to be babied by his own mother," he groaned.

Good, Jo was not feeling the least bit motherly towards him right now.

Her boy though, he was bringing forth the mama bear. Ethan looked rough, his hangdog expression wasn't even the worst of it. It was clear that summiting the stairs had worn him out, he'd leaned against the door jamb before folding himself next to her right there on the nursery floor.

"Mummy, will you make me tea and toast?" He pouted and she was about to push his mouth away because he hadn't called her mummy since he was 8. She stopped right before she made contact.

"Does your head hurt?" She laid the back of her hand across his forehead, like he might have a fever or something. It was an automatic accompaniment to the question though.

"Yes..." he looked up at her with his head on her shoulder. "Is it big? It feels really big?"

"Did you take anything?" she whispered and nodded her head to his sleeping and ever growing sister.