Bring Back the Music (Return to Narnia)

Chapter 2

Susan Pevensie sat on the blue couch in her New York apartment. It was a pretty little place, with white curtains on the windows overlooking the city and a yellow tablecloth on the one small table, but it had a sort of lonely feeling.

What am I doing here? Susan asked herself. She'd been asking herself this question for months now. But why? Why doesn't this feel right? Susan asked. Why wouldn't she want to be in New York right now? After all, she had a comfortable apartment, a good job at the radio station, and even a cute boyfriend that she'd met last month at a party. Now twenty-two years old, Susan was stunningly beautiful, went to lavish parties, and had enough makeup for several girls. Her life was the envy of every American girl. So what in the world was wrong?

Maybe I need a vacation. The city's so busy... or maybe I need more friends. How many real friends do I actually have? I don't even have a best friend. A little voice whispered in her head. "You used to have a best friend."

"Yes, I used to have a best friend." Susan was speaking out loud now. She was quite annoyed to be reminded of last year's painful events. "Lucy's gone now. She died in a train accident a year ago. There's nothing I can do for her or anyone else in my family. All of them were on that train." She talked out loud to convince herself of the lack of emotion she felt. She wasn't very successful and continued, "But I don't care. I don't need them, I don't need anyone. I'm just fine here, and there's nothing wrong with me!" Susan walked to the window and put her elbows on the sill. If she could just talk to Lucy, just for a few minutes...

In truth, Susan was sorry. She was sorry for going to America and not coming back to visit. She was sorry that she had stopped writing Lucy and that her letters had sounded angry and snobbish. But most of all, she was sorry that her family was gone, and that she'd never had a chance to say goodbye. No matter if she and her siblings hadn't always gotten along. No matter if they were all a bit insane, talking about... that place -Susan wouldn't even think about Narnia. But now it was too late! Too late to mend things, too late to apologize... Maybe if I had been there, if I had done something, was her constant thought. Then I might still have my best friend. I'd still have my family.

Susan looked at the clock. Blythe would be here any minute. Her boyfriend was tall and lean, with blue eyes that sparkled when he talked to her. He looks a little bit like Peter, she thought. But thinking of Peter was painful, for he too, was gone. Only twenty-three at the time of the train crash, Peter had graduated from college with honors only weeks before. He had tried to write to Susan, as had Lucy, Edmund, and their parents, but she didn't reply to any of them after a while. Now she missed her older brother.

Susan also regretted that she had never really gotten to know her brother Edmund. When he was a child, he had been mischievous and selfish. Then he had changed suddenly, that summer when they had been at Professor Kirke's. But Susan had always had trouble accepting this new Edmund. Usually, she had avoided mentioning that summer, mostly because the others would always bring up... What was that place called again? It doesn't matter, it was just a game, she told herself. That wouldn't help me get Edmund back.

Two days after the crash, Susan remembered, when she had attended the funeral, she had seen her siblings, each lying in a casket, eyes closed, unmoving. None of them had looked like themselves. A tear slid down Susan's cheek. I'll never see them alive again.

The expected knock came suddenly on the front door. Susan quickly dried her eyes, put on a smile, and opened it with a cheerful "Hello, Blythe!"

Nobody was there.

"Hello? Blythe?" Thin air was the only answer. There was silence in the long hallway of the fifth floor. Susan closed the door. "What..."

The knock came again. Anxiously she threw the door open, eager to catch the person causing this mischief.

"Hi, Susan!" Blythe said cheerily. Noticing her face, he asked, "What's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing," Susan said hastily. "I'll get my purse."

"O.K." Blythe waited by the door, and soon the two of them were off to the park for a picnic.

Susan had been looking forward to this outing for a week, but she really didn't enjoy it. The lunch was delicious (Blythe had obviously spent all morning preparing it), and the sun sent glittering light through the trees, but Susan was only worrying about what happened back in the apartment. Sitting on the sparkling afternoon grass on a blanket, she was lost in thought. Now I'm hearing things, along with being overwhelmed with everything else? What was going on back there? Am I going crazy?

"... and then I fell over and knocked the jug of milk into his lap!" Blythe finished dramatically, laughing. "Susan?"

"Oh yes, ha ha ha," Susan said, startled, with a belated laugh.

"Were you listening? Are you really alright?" Blythe asked her. "You just seem distracted today."

"Yes, I'm fine," Susan said. "Oh, goodness! I'm going to be late for work! Goodbye, I had a lovely time." She hugged Blythe and hopped quickly onto her bike.

"Susan!" he called after her.

"I have work at four!" she called back.

As soon as Susan reached home, she quickly changed for work. While she put on her shoes, she sang and tapped a rhythm with her fingers. Suddenly, she heard a sound. It was a rustling, swooshing noise that seemed to be moving. The radio in her room suddenly stopped. "What's that?" Susan was beginning to feel scared. What is wrong with me? She closed the door firmly behind her.

As she walked briskly down the street to the radio station, she thought, That sound seemed familiar. Where have I heard that sound before? It's almost like- the talking trees. Susan shook her head. But those don't exist, she told herself. They were only in the silly games we played growing up. In that place... Lucy always... Susan stopped that thought. Why couldn't she just move on with life, instead of thinking about Lucy every moment? In fact, Susan had thought about almost no one else for the past three days!