Last night he left our home at 12 am talking about he needed juice. He needed juice alright, juice that isn't mine. Unfortunately, I still love this unfaithful bastard. I've been in love with this man since I was 19. I've given him my all and everyt...
I turned on the television and sat down. I got up again and went to get my laptop out of my tote. Since I'm sitting here I could spend some time researching divorce lawyers. You can talk about getting divorced all day until you actually do something about it, it's just talking. I want out of this marriage, and a fresh start.
I started searching for divorce lawyers in my area. They had so many listed. I would have to set up appointments to see how much they would charge me. I also wanted to see about the divorces where I didn't have to worry about him if he didn't want to sign the papers. I forgot what it was called so I looked it up. I thought it was called an uncontested divorce, but that didn't mean what I thought it did. If Gavin doesn't want to sign these papers I'm basically screwed. There has to be a loophole somewhere; I looked at so many sites. I really didn't understand this legal jargon at all. I need to get back to random stuff about different fields I was curious about.
I took a deep breath and closed the laptop; I opened it again and decided to just look around online. I was never really into Facebook, but I went on there anyway. Kendra had been bugging me about joining groups and getting to know people. I couldn't really see much on my phone. The laptop was better. I don't know if I necessarily just wanted to get to know random people. That seemed a bit odd to me, then again, it's not like I really planned on meeting any of these people. This just might be a good idea. I had been added to a few groups already. Kendra definitely wasted no time when it came to trying to turn me into a hipster or introduce me to something new. She used to call me a shut-in; I never really did anything that involved getting out of the house. I was a homebody and introvert to the third degree. There was only one exception, I did have tendencies to be social.
My crazy sister added me to some of those groups, where people are looking to hook up with someone. That just wasn't the case for me. I already had a few men around me, and that was enough. I joined a fiction writing group and learned a few things. One, November was National Novel writers' month. This I did find kind of interesting, along with what you actually had to do to finish by the end of the month. Millions of people participated in this every year. You write a novel in 50,000 words or more in thirty days. Well, I did need something to keep me busy, at least until Mr. Colon resurfaced. Someone in the group posted the site, I went to register, and I looked around on the site. This could be the perfect way to get my feet wet writing fiction, or some other genre. I really haven't decided where to take this writing thing. I just know that I want to do it, and have fun doing it. I also figured out that I had read enough romance novels to make me nauseous for the next ten years. In other words, writing about romance was just not for me. It had definitely gotten super cheesy for me over the years. Every book about romance went like this.
Girl leaves the first boy because he has commitment issues, lack of appreciation, or she's plus-sized. There's almost always a break up which is kind of cliché to me. Girl hooks up with the second boy and he swears he loves her within thirty minutes of meeting her. Oh, let us not forget that lately, every romance novel I read has these unrealistic men who were almost always millionaires or billionaires. This is only after everyone read the fifty shades of grey series. Now, romance is oversaturated and a bit tacky for my taste. I don't really read them anymore. I'm looking for other things to read and hopefully write.
I'm curious about fantasy because I started reading the Anita Blake Vampire series by Laurell K. Hamilton. I like that series a lot and it kept me interested in what would happen next with all of the characters. A good friend introduced me to the series a while ago. Reading has kept me sane over the years. It's what I call my drug when people ask me what I'm addicted to, I usually say caffeine and books. Don't get me wrong I love being a wife and a mother, but literature is a way for me to escape all of that. Now I'm truly wondering what I am going to write once I start.
I looked at the clock and it said 3 am. I was up way too long trying to figure things out. I took my glass to the kitchen and put it in the sink. I stopped in the hall that led to the living room, and smiled. Even though things in my life were changing, I felt pretty damn good. I went over to the couch, turned off the television, and shut down my laptop for the night. I really needed to get clothes together for the kids. They were having such a good time at Kendra's that I kept extending their stay when they asked. Kendra loved having them at home with her. She really didn't get to see them much, but I'll take care of all of that in the morning.
I set the alarm, turned off the lights, and strolled down the hall to my bedroom. I climbed into bed and drifted off to sleep.
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The next morning I woke up feeling refreshed and rested. I went to each room and got extra clothes for the babies. It seems like they will be staying with their auntie Kendra indefinitely. I think my babies are still traumatized from the Shantay incident. They don't want to come home until they know everything is good, especially with their father. They have been giving him the cold shoulder since they found out about her.
