Adamantine - D.M.

Chapter 15 - Clarity & Cowardice

I was catapulted out of the memory and back onto the dusty floor of the tower room. Mind whirling, I didn't know where to begin. My parents, death eaters? But... they'd died trying to warn Harry's parents, to save Harry. I could still see my mother, ashed-faced and wailing over my father's dead body. Voldemort thought, after all this time that they'd succeeded in warning the Ministry to protect Harry. That the reason he was destroyed that fateful Halloween night, was because of them.

The illusion was shattered. I had grieved strangers; not parents. Despite the deceit, one question lingered at the back of my mind. They'd died to protect a child they'd never known. Can one act of heroism absolve a lifetime of cowardice?

"Do you understand now?" I'd forgotten once again, that Draco was in the room. I could no longer remain ambivalent towards him. The distaste started in my mouth, loathing primed into every syllable as I spoke. "You. sold. me. out. to. Voldemort." Exasperated, Draco argued, "You don't understand, he was going to kill me. In fact, he still might". I scoffed. "Do you honestly think I give a shit?" I said callously "You made some oath to turn me over to Voldemort, for something my parents did? I thought-" I didn't dare to continue, lest I expose myself for having even contemplated any feelings towards him other than hatred.

"You'd rather me dead? Go ahead then, go on" He urged caustically, seeming to relish the instance that I didn't raise my wand. "You can despise me all you want, but you're stuck now. Welcome to the fucking club" Draco said dryly, walking out of the room with a sideways glance. "Can I at least go home?" I called after him. He ignored me. Running to catch up, I stalked haughtily up behind him in the corridor below. He whipped around. "Do you think that's it?" he said dangerously. Panic seeped into his voice, which had lowered to a whisper. "I don't understand. What does he want? If torturing and killing people is on the calendar for tomorrow, just go ahead and kill me now. I'm not my parents". I added spitefully, knowing that Draco had chosen to be a Death Eater, like them. He reached a hand into his blazer and pulled out a small vial, like the one he'd dumped into the Pensieve. "I'm going to bed. Do what you want". He handed me the vial and turned on his heels to walk back in the direction of the bedroom I'd woken up in.

I examined the vial in my hands. Unlike the other, which had been Lucius's, it had no writing. Was this Draco's own memory? I wasted no time sprinting back up the stairs into the damp room. The contents of Draco's vial swirled, and I plunged my head back into the shadowy clouds of memory.

I'd been here before. I was back in the Malfoy's drawing room, the scene familiar and unchanged. Draco's hand clasped with Voldemort's, making the vow. Why did he want me to see this again? Anger bubbled once again as I watched Draco vow to help Voldemort exact revenge on my parents. I waited for the memory to cut off, but it didn't. Lucius continued to hold out his wand and took a deep, steadying breath.

"Do you, Draco- vow to carry out the Dark Lord's wishes, and kill Albus Dumbledore?"

"I do"

"What happens if you break an unbreakable vow?" My conversation with Romilda played once again in my mind. "Well, you can't break an unbreakable vow".

"I'd worked that much out for myself, funnily enough. What happens if you break it, then?"

"You die".