TPOD

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LYDIA DEETZ AND THE ORB OF STORMS

Capítulo 6: TPOD


The small apartment was small and smelly, a stench consisting of several t-shirts and unwashed socks that made Percy's nose pucker, along with the smell of lack of toilet facilities was one that came from several containers of fast food that had not yet been discarded, yet it was a particular smell that caught the eye, at least Lydia's.

"Is this the one?"

"Yes," said one of the musicians as he showed the two young men what a marijuana smoking pipe looked like. "It's The Pipe of Destiny."

Both Lydia and Percy exchanged incredulous looks but the two fat middle-aged guys told them how they had discovered a mystical object called The Pick of Destiny, an artifact that was forged from one of Satan's own teeth, and then lost it in a rock duel against him, and finally ripped out his horn and sent him back to hell.

"Do you believe them, Lydia?"

"I don't see any sign of a lie in their auras. Besides, if I have a catboy next to me, I don't see why I shouldn't believe these two."

Jables, or as JB called himself, was the leader of the rock duo, had a funny rounded baby face that didn't match his dangerous lunatic eyes, but he was a very good person.

Kage, or as he preferred to call himself by his stage name KG, was also a good-natured fat man but unlike his partner he was bald and seemed to be older.

"It was the most awesome music ever heard on Earth," Jables told the two boyfriends excitedly. It was epic!

"Too bad we lost The Pick of Destiny in the end," said Kage with a sad gesture.

"Yeah, but we won the TPOD in return."

"The TPOD?" Lydia said.

"Yes, The Pipe of Destiny," said Jables, accentuating each syllable to make it sound more impressive.

"Oh my God," said Lydia, looking annoyed with a nervous smile. Percy on the other hand bent in two and started laughing so hard that his ears and cat's tail came out.

Both Jables and Kage were impressed but after rubbing their eyes with the knuckles of their hands they saw that there was nothing unusual about the young man.

"Wow, I think we smoked a lot of "power herbs" with the TPOD," said Jables, and Kage nodded.

According to the musicians, the devil's pick could make any singer extraordinary and they hoped that by smoking Satan's pipe, they would receive "divine" inspiration to compose rock masterpieces and thus become famous.

"Can that be true, Lydia?"

"Perhaps Percy, it is proven that drugs such as tobacco, alcohol or others help the neural connections, that is, they accelerate the creative process in writers. Hemingway, for example, was well known for his love of alcohol, to say the least, I don't know how effective it would be to get high with this magic pipe."

"And tell me," Lydia continued, "has smoking this thing worked yet?"

"Emm, well, not really... no. Nothing yet," admitted Jables.

"If you call nothing the fact that I fart every time I smoke from the TPOD," said Kage.

"Don't go smoking that thing! At least in our presence!" exclaimed Percy.

"Then why don't you just leave it?" Lydia suggested. Drugs are bad.

"Maybe it will work one day," he said. "Don't you want to give it a little taste?"

"NO!" Lydia and Percy shouted at the same time.

"Why don't you sell the pipe to pay for your apartment?" Lydia asked. "There are eviction notices all over the place, if you convince the right buyer you can get a lot of money."

"And to whom could we sell it?" Kage asked.

"How about an oil sheikh?" Percy's suggestion. With the petrodollars they have, you' re sure to make a bundle.

Jables and Kage crossed glances as if contemplating the suggestion.

"Look, we'd better concentrate right now," said Lydia. "We should go to Black Widow Company and get you a job."

"I don't know... our thing is to be rock stars in front of a stage full of people," he said.

"Yes, we are Tenacius D," concluded Kage with a silly smile.

"But if you get the job, you'll get paid very well indeed!" Lydia told them.

"But the scenarios..."

"The only stages you're going to go to will be as spectators, and that's if you manage to raise enough money for the tickets, which I find very difficult," Percy told them without much tact.

"Look, if you get the job, even Black Widow might make you regular composers," said Lydia. "There are big companies with regular composers like Jerry Goldsmith or Dany Elfman, both very famous. The same thing can happen to you if you take the job. Come on, please!"

"Besides, look at yourselves. You are already in your 40s and have no food, no money, no dog barking at you."

"Percy!"

"Well, maybe we'll give that movie company a chance," said Jables after exchanging looks with his friend.

.

.

Once everyone at Black Widow and to Lydia's relief, the two musicians were hired. Morgan Burns was delighted, in fact if it wasn't for being a serious executive producer, he would have jumped for excitement at the time.

"Well, Mr. Burns, now for Elvira's address..."

"Of course, Miss Deetz, let me see, here you go. Please do not share it with anyone."

"Don't worry and thank you," the Gothic girl thanked him for saying goodbye to his friends and, together with Percy, left the building.

When the kids were already on the way out of the filming grounds of the film companies, both Jables and Kage ran up to them.

"What's going on? Don't tell me you had a problem."

"No one," said Jables mumbling down the street, "just, well, we wanted to give you this, Lydia."

"But this is his magic pipe, I can't accept it."

"Please do it. You were right, Lydia, You both were. It's time we started working seriously and stopped fantasizing."

"Are you sure about this?"

"We are, Lydia," Kage assured her.

Lydia accepted the present and together with Percy returned to the urban jungle of that modern Babylon called Hollywood.

CONTINUARÁ...



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