Uniform

Moving On

We step off of the elevator and head towards my apartment. I unlock the door and let Aaron and Bailey in, in front of me. "You're living room is as big as ours back at home," Aaron says. "Thanks, I guess." I walk towards my parents' room and open the door, I go over to the closet and begin throwing clothes onto the bed. 

"What are you doing Sage?" Bailey asks as I continue throwing clothes onto the bed. "I'm cleaning their room out," I reply nonchalantly.

 "Are you sure? We can do that another time-"

"No, I want to do it now, you can help me if you want," I say interrupting Aaron. I know that if I don't do this now I'll never do it. I know it's not healthy to suppress my feelings; I should let myself grieve but I'm scared. I'm scared that if I grieve I'll never stop and I'll be stuck here forever. 

After 30 minutes Aaron, Bailey, and I were able to get everything out of the closet. " I want to give the clothes to Goodwill; can you go buy some boxes for me to put the clothes in?"

"Sure I'll go, Bailey stay here and keep helping Sage," Aaron replies to my question. Aaron gives Bailey a parting kiss before leaving to go buy boxes. I'm never gonna see my parents kiss ever again. I slightly regret all the times I've booed them and said it was disgusting to kiss in front of me. I never actually meant it and they knew that but it still makes me feel bad. 

"We can take a break and wait for Aaron to get back if you'd like," Bailey says in her soft loving voice.

"No, I'm okay I want to get through as much as I can today... Thank you for coming from..."

"England," Bailey says finishing my sentence for me. " You and Aaron have Irish accents, why do you live in England?" 

" We  own a business and the biggest warehouse we could find that we could afford was in England so we moved there." 

"Oh, what is your business?"

"We make mannequins for stores like the ones you see in the mall."

"Oh, well that's interesting." 

Aaron comes into the room with unbuilt boxes. I didn't even notice that he had come back yet. "So how are we organizing all the clothes?" Aaron asks. "I don't want any of it just put all of it in boxes I'm giving it to Goodwill." 

"Are you sure you don't want to keep any?" Bailey says with concern laced in her voice. "Yes, please just help me put it in the boxes." 

It's 10 P.M. when all the clothing is in the boxes. "Goodwill is closed by now we'll bring the clothes by tomorrow. You should go to bed Sage get your rest okay?" Aaron says. I nod my head and go to my room. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I wake up to my alarm blaring at 6 A.M. I get out of bed and walk to the bathroom for my shower. While I'm in the shower I start to reflect on everything that has happened over the past couple of days. I begin to sob letting the grief consume me temporarily, when I get out of the shower I wipe my face and put on the facade that I'm fine. I walk to my room to go get dressed. "Why are you up so early?" I jump and almost drop my towel frightened by the disembodied voice. "Sorry I didn't mean to scare you," Aaron says while walking down the hallway towards me. 

"It's fine, I'm getting ready for school."

"You're not going to school."

"Why not?" 

Aaron gives me a stern look as if to say you know why. I look down defeated and head toward my room to get dressed for the day. When I'm done dressing Aaron is sitting on the couch in the living room scrolling through his phone. 

"What am I going to do today if I'm not going to school today?" 

"You need to take it easy, it's not good for you to act like your parents' death hasn't affected you."

"I know and I'll face it when I'm ready to. Can we do something to get my mind off of it?"

"Sure. Do you have a passport?"

"No, why?"

"Well, you're going to need one to come back to England to live with us."

"Oh, okay."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So much has happened in one month. I packed up all of my parents' things and I've either kept them or given them to Goodwill. The funeral was a week after they died and I was the only person at the funeral who didn't cry. I didn't cry, because I was afraid that If I started I'd never stop. The day after the funeral I started packing up my things. Most of my clothes went to Goodwill because they didn't fit anymore. When we finished packing all of my things we sent it to Aaron and Bailey's house back in England. My passport came in the mail a week ago and now I'm sitting in an airplane for the first time in my life. My new life without my parents awaits me in 18 hours.