Twist Of Fate

TOF•2

Jema's POV

"W-What the hell is this?"

Hindi ko alam kung pano ko pa nagawang sabihin ang mga salitang 'yon ang tanging nararamdaman ko na lang kasi ay ang sakit na nasa dibdib ko. It felt like I'm burning inside. Hindi ko namalayan na unti-unti na pa lang tumulo ang mga luha mula sa mga mata ko. Nanlalabo ang mga mata ko pero klarong-klaro pa rin sa utak ko ang mga nakita ko. Fhen and Mylene... They're were kissing. I forcedly shook my head to forgot that images. Fhen tried to go near me but all I did was to swat her hand away that's trying to reach me.

"B-Babe, please let me explain..." She's crying too but my eyes were fixed on her hand holding her hand.

Pakiramdam ko ay nabasag ako. It felt like my whole damn world turned into ashes. I cried so hard and I didn't know that I could cry this much. "E-Explain what? Explain how you cheated on me? Explain how you kiss each other passionately? Explain how you held her hand that tight? Fck it Fhen! Fck it!" I knelt down the floor at doon umiyak ng umiyak. I maybe look like a fool right now, but I don't give a damn. Mas masakit ang nararamdaman ko para isipin pa ang sasabihin nila.

They were asking for my forgiveness. Mylene, my best friend even tried to hug me but all I did was too pushed her hard making her face the floor.

"Jema, ano ba?!" Galit. Bakas ang galit sa sigaw na 'yon ni Fhen and that I knew enough, I already lost her. Tiningnan ko silang dalawa, Fhen hugging Mylene, asking if she's okay the latter nodding her head. Tiningnan ko si Mylene, I gave her please-take-care-of-her smile. I wiped my tears and tried to fixed my self, she was about to go near me again but I signalled her don't because I might push her again.

I stood up still tears running down my eyes. I cleared my throat as I bid them my goodbye. "Take care each other. Please, make this pain," itinuro ko ang dibdib kong hanggang ngayon ay para paring pinipiga ng milyong katao. "Worth it." I said before I gave them the saddest smile I could give before turning my back and walked away.

Noong masiguro ko nang malayo na ako sa kanila saka naman kumawala ang malalakas na paghikbi ko habang naglalakad pabalik ng dorm. Napakadilim ng dinaraanan ko tanging malalayong lamp post mula sa nilalakaran ko at ang bituin at buwan ang tanging nagsisilbing ilaw ko. Its a dark night but I could say that what I'm feeling is way darker. My life seems too dark, because I lost the one that brights up my dark days.

I maybe stupid for letting them go this easy but I couldn't be so heartless to not give them a chance to be happy with each other. Ayokong maging hadlang sa kasiyahan nila even if it cost me my happiness, I'm willing to give up.

So, I guess. This is a goodbye.

---

Naalimpungatan ako dahil sa sinag ng araw na tumatama sa mga mata ko. Umayos ako ng umupo at sumandal sa headboard ng kama saka tumingin sa kawalan. Napahawak ako sa dibdib ko ng ilang segundo, its still beating fast but at the same it felt like its twisting. Masakit pa din, hanggang ngayon meron pa din. I half-smiled before I went up from my bed and headed to the bathroom.

Naalala ko noon. Si Fhen lagi ang gumigising sa'kin from a very deep sleep. Sabi kasi nila I'm too sleepy head na tipong kakailanganin pang buhusan ako ng tubig para lamang magising at sa tuwing magigising naman ako mula sa magandang panginip nakakatanggap naman ng tadyak ang gumising sa'kin but when that girl happened to me. She's the one who always dare to wake me up. Tinitiis niya lagi ang tadyak ko tuwing umaga hanggang sa unti-unti ko ng nakasanayan na sa bawat umaga boses niya ang gigising sa'kin mula sa mahimbing na pagkatulog. Nasanay ako na everyday may breakfast na nakahanda sa bedside table ko. Nakasanayan ko na may Fhen Emnas na matamis ang ngiti sa'kin. Until we broke up.