Broken || h.s. AU (old version)

Chapter 33 - Forgiven

Chapter 33 - Forgiven

I wait silently along the treeline, Harry's hand tightly around mine. The week had taken a somber turn of events from the beach trip with Harry.

We stand at a distance from the small shroud of people dressed in black, hidden amongst the trees towards the edge of the graveyard. Harry's aunt had informed us that my mother's funeral was to be held the Thursday following her death. But needless to say, her supposedly dead daughter couldn't be seen amongst the crowd. So with some coaxing from Harry, we both stand at a distance, waiting for the crowd to disperse.

It seems like an eternity as we wait, Harry stoic-faced as he stares straight ahead at the crowd, while I'm the complete opposite. I've been staring at the short, stringy grass at my feet, soft sobs rattling my whole frame. Harry has offered multiple times to take me home but each time I refuse, determined to wait out the crowd.

No matter how many times I have "the realization" that she's gone, I can't make myself believe that it's her in the glossy coffin that seems just barely out of reach.

"I'm so sorry, pips..." Harry whispers to my side, his hand loosening from mine as his arms envelop me, holding me into his chest. I just stand there, crying and crying as he holds me silently, barely swaying side to side. I don't know how long we stay like that, I just know it's too long in my taste.

But finally, Harry's lips press to my head, murmuring softly into my hair. "We can go over now..."

I barely nod into his chest, swiping at my cheeks quickly before reluctantly stepping out of his warm embrace, sliding my hand into his as I shakily make my way across the uneven ground, wobbling a bit in my heels.

But it seems that every step I make towards the patch of dirt thats just slightly darker than the rest, the distance increases exhaustedly. Yet once we reach her grave, it's somehow too soon.

"Do you want me to leave you alone for a bit?" Harry asks quietly, his hand squeezing mine gently.

My heart clenches at the idea.

"No." I reply thickly, shaking my head. "I don't want to be alone." I whisper, looking up at his face.

He nods once solemnly, swallowing hard as he looks back to the dark marble gravestone. While waiting to approach, I had planned out this big speech to myself that I would say. This long declaration of how I will never forget her or be able to thank her for everything she'd done for me.

But I can't say it. All I can do is stare at the golden-engraved writing.

"R.I.P.
Diana Anne Rose"

I hate it.

I wish with all my heart that below her name could be "Loving mother and wife," but nobody knows that. She wasn't a wife. Her husband left. They don't know she was still a mother. They think I'm gone too.

So written plainly on the stone is just "R.I.P. Diana Anne Rose."

I feel Harry's shoulder brush mine lightly as he steps closer to me and for some reason, this sends me over the edge.

I break down into loud, shuddering, violent sobs. My heart clenches and writhes and pounds so hard, I can hear its throbbing in my head. I can feel Harry's gaze burning into the side of my head anxiously, see him shifting his weight, hear his mouth opening and closing as he tries to say something. He only tightens his grip on my hand, his shoulder lightly pressed against mine as if he's unsure if he can do any more.

But then there's a new sound in the heavy air.

Soft sniffles come from my left, followed by Harry's arms wrapping around me again, his face burying into my hair as he cries.