Chasing the Night || a moey au

Chapter Five

-Chapter Five-

My eyes fluttered open to a strong pounding in my head and a violent ringing in my ears. It took me a couple seconds to take in my unusual surroundings. Everything looked different, for one reason or another. Maybe it was my blurred vision from my pounding headache but I always remembered my ceiling going up in a point with the roof. To me, the white roof was large and flat.

I propped myself up on my elbows, instantly feeling the blood rush to my head making it pound faster. I grabbed my head in pain, only to receive another sear of pain in my back, running up my spine. Almost every bone in my body ached making my ears ring in pain.

I finally opened my eyes from their squinting, only to be greeted by a view that I was never greeted by in the morning. Nothing was the same. There was no hard wood floor, no small window to my right, no door in front of me. Instead, the floor was covered in a gray carpet, the window was above my head emitting a dim light onto the bed in front of me, and the door was to my right.

I started to panic, feeling sweat already gather on my fore head. I've been kidnapped, my mind repeated over and over, screaming at me. I threw the covers off my sweaty body, trying to replay everything that happened the night before. My feet hit the ground silently, cautiously making no noise. All I remembered was my walk to my street corner.

Everything from walking out the door of Paul's café to the constant waiting on my street corner beside the busy street and in front of the long, dark alley way. The alley way, I shivered at the memory of the dark, eerie place. With every step, I fought the pain running up and down my back.

The door opened with a slight creak, making my heart race in fear. With every step, I placed my toes lightly on the soft floor, trying not to lower my bare heel in fear that the carpeted floor would somehow make a noise. I spotted my shoes just outside the room in a short hallway that led to other rooms. To my right was a staircase which leaded to who knows where but I decided on that route.

When I looked to my left, someone stood there in the darkness of the hallway. I jumped back, startled as my heart jumped with my feat. I felt my hands starting to shake slightly, the sweat appearing at my hair line once again. My back argued with pain at my choice of movements. I grabbed my shoes in one hand, using the other hand to stable myself as I held it out beside me. With heat pounding in my head, an echoing ring in my ears, and aching muscles, I tried my best to run down the stairs, turning away from the dark outline of a figure and heading down the stairs.

"Wait! Girl, stop!" Obviously a mans voice called out from where the figure stood. By then I was halfway down the staircase, trying to chose between holding my back or my head in pain. I recognized the mysterious voice though, something familiar rang in the man's voice that I couldn't recall. It wasn't something that made me uncomfortable or afraid, but a certain friendliness or sincereness that almost made me want to listen to his call.

A strong hand landed on my shoulder, making me flinch with fear and making adrenaline throw me down the stairs, missing a step. "Don't be scared, just wait, please!"

I stopped dead in my tracks, not moving even one muscle. Partly because after adrenaline numbed my body, the pain returned stronger and more confident to argue with my movements. And partly because I was so frightened and startled that I couldn't move. But for some odd reason, a small part of me actually wanted to listen to this man because I didn't feel threatened by his voice.

"Don't touch me," I whispered because if I had spoken any louder then fear would take over my voice and that wouldn't end well. I turned around, seeing the man in full light now that he stood on the wooden stair I had skipped in my adrenaline rush.

"I'm sorry," he pushed a reassuring smile, "but I won't hurt you, promise."

I stumbled back in realization that this familiar voice was the same man I had bumped into at the store.

"Y-You're the guy from the grocery store!" I spoke louder, stuttering.

"Yes I remember," he said back, running a hand through his hair awkwardly as he did on the sidewalk outside the store.

We stood there staring at each other for what felt like the longest time. With every second, I imagined a piece of scenery that would match the colour of his uniquely coloured eyes. Whether it be sky or grass, trees or water, there was nothing that could match the strong colour of his eyes. I could stand there forever, if I really wanted to, but i remembered my goal: to get out of this unknown place.

Again I turned around, not saying a word, ready to bolt for the door.

"Wait girl!" The man called again, just before I touched the doorknob, "I'm not going to put you in danger, I did, in fact, help you."

And then, I remembered.

My halfway blacked out body lay limb in strong hands. I couldn't see anything, or really feel anything, but to me, I could hear everything. Loud shouts and curses filled my ears until they were nothing but an almost painful ringing. The ringing was so loud I wanted to cover my ears with the palms of my hands but I couldn't. I couldn't move my body even if I tried, it was like I was dead but alive. Before long, everything went black again.

The sound of my own breathing woke me up this time. So harsh and fast that it made me stand up on my elbows. I was in someone else's bed, in someone's else's room, in someone else's house. But at the moment, I didn't care about anything as a panic attack washed away all other emotions I was feeling.

"Shhh," I heard from beside me, again someone I didn't know but didn't care. The soothing sounds even calmed me as the sweat literally poured from my forehead and lower back. It felt like needles were being pressed into every inch of my skin in addition to the pains in my bones already there. Like a game of battle ship, pressing the needles into every separate square of my body, but when numbness took over, the needles tried a different spot. When the needle finally hit a spot that reacted to its sharp touch, it would blow up. The pain would shake through my body making me want to rip my skin out.

"Lay down." The mysterious voice whispered. It was dark, to me at least. My eyes were dry and crusty and everything appeared black. Every so often, it felt like soundless lightning found it's way into the room and cracked right in front of my cloudy eyes. Something cold, but pleasurably cold, was pressed to my forehead, eliminating some of the needles pressing into my forehead and behind my ears. It was hard to distinguish what was water and what was sweat at this point because of my heated body temperature but cold sweat.

Every part of my body shook with every sharp inhale. I felt scared. Scared that something was going to jump out at me or hurt me or anything bad. I felt like I was in a small room with no one to help me. I felt suffocated and isolated, unable to go anywhere because of my unknown location and lack of vision.

"You'll be okay," the voice soothed, moving the source of coldness around my forehead, "just try to calm down."

There were so many things I wanted to say, so many things I wanted to scream, cry, whisper, but i didn't. Instead, my fingers wrapped around the cool door knob and using all my strength, while uncovering another pain in my shoulder, I twisted it.

With bare feet, I stepped out onto the hot pavement and ran. Running could very well be my favourite thing to do. It's my 'weapon' of choice. They ask me, flee or fight? I don't answer, I flee right away like a fucking coward. I don't even watch the scenery fly past me as I run. I'm only looking ahead of me, at the future in front of me. I try so hard to grasp that unknown future, wishing that in some way it would be better than my present. I use the future to escape my messed up present. It takes all my willpower to actually convince myself that my future would be a simple continuation of my present. If I don't change my present, then I don't change my future.

But instead, I just let it fly past me as I run. I run away from everything and everyone. I'm a fucking coward no matter how strong I try to appear to be. Who could be strong when they spend their life trying to find pennies on the sidewalk. Who could be strong when they shrug off everyone who wants to help them, as they continue to be in pain. Who could be strong when they spend long nights selling love to men. They can't. And that's my life.