Chasing the Night || a moey au

Chapter Ten

- Chapter Ten -
"Meghan!" Her voice rang a mocking tone, "Come on out! I just wanna have a nice friendly chat!" She talked to me like a little vulnerable girl. Like I was her literal torture dummy. I'd sometimes like to blame her for this mess I call life, but I know, no matter what I say, it's my fault. In the end, blaming someone for your mistakes is not going to lessen the guilt.

I stayed put, not moving a single muscle, staying at the very edge of my window pressed to the wall. There was no way of hiding from her, I tried. For gods sake, I moved states to get away from her! She's never satisfied.

"Hmm, okay, seems like friendliness isn't going to get you to talk," she spoke louder, trying to get my attention, "What if I mention the name...Joey?"

I flinched, ready to run downstairs, out the door, and rip all of her hair out. I should've known. She will go through anything to ruin my life, as if it's not ruined enough. She's a heartless bitch. "How do you know him!?" I yelled back at her through the thin glass of my window.

"Ah she speaks!" I couldn't see her face, but I knew she was already smirking, "How could I not know such a fine man like that." She laughed her awful flirty laugh. I sighed, leaning my head against the wall behind me with my eyes completely shut.

"How was the sex?" My eyes shot open at what she said. I stood up straight and finally showed myself to the window. This was obviously so much fun for her.
"I know you think I sleep around with everybody who crosses my path, and I don't blame you. I mean, everyone thinks that. I'm a slut, and don't think I don't know that. But I have feelings too, and I can try for a life one day." I stared down at her perfect hair and makeup.

"You're an idiot, Meghan." She shot back, "Someday your secret will get out and everyone will hate you once again in your shitty life! Now excuse me while I go get that man of yours for myself."

"He's not my man!" I slammed my hand against the wall to the right of my window. "And I didn't touch him, nor do I plan on doing so anytime soon! He was just nice to me, and no one has ever been nice to me before."

"Well maybe you deserve it!" She yelled back before I heard her heels clicking away from the bakery.

"I know I do." I muttered to myself as she left, hitting my back against the wall and slouching.

**

The scariest thing I could think about while standing and waiting at my street corner was: how long? How long will I have to stay under the shadows and go by a false name? How long will I have to be unemployed because of fear of giving out my information? How long will I have to stay away from hospitals and schools because of their personal information intake? How long will I have to spend hiding? And most importantly, how long until I have to leave this place, and run away again?

It prevents me from getting a job, getting medical treatment, having a suitable education, and ofcourse, having a life. I'll soon have to leave again, take a new road, find a new life. For better or for worse. I wish I had never met Joey, I planed to stay hidden. I knew Tiff was going to tell Joey my secrets one day, and I had to slip out right from under then before that. I have to leave again, and it kills me to say that.

I heard a honk to my left that startled me. I saw a car pull up and roll it's windows down. "Hey!" A man from inside yelled towards me. I instantly put on my fake smile, fake talk, and fake walk on and walked closer to the car.

"Hey!" I dragged out the 'y' as I leaned into his car through the open window. The more I talked, the more I wished time would go by so much faster.

I slid into the car after he told me to get in. My mind was filled with regret yet I've been doing this exact thing for practically my whole time in LA. It has just been now, ever since I met Joey, that I've started feeling bad for sleeping around with all these people. It was, although, how I got by in life, but I just felt an uncertainty now.

"What's your name?" He asked me, pressing his foot on the gas. He was slightly attractive. His hair was black and met in the front centre of his head in a little point, held together by gel. He was athletic, from the looks of it, and had dark ebony eyes. His lips always curved downwards as if he was mad, but he talked with a happy intention. Still, with every aspect of him I thought about how to make myself believe he was attractive. My mind just compared him to Joey. It was as if Joey had invaded my mind and destroyed every thought of handsomeness in another man. I liked Joey, a lot.

"Whatever you want it to be," I answered, a thing one of the other girls taught me to say when I first started off with my street life.

He laughed, "But I wanna know your real name." We stopped at a red light and he turned to look at me. All that ran through my mind were the different ways Joey has said "Bree" before. His sweet voice rang it my head so loud that it prevented me from thinking of another fake name to go by.

So all I could think of was, "Breanna."

"That's a very pretty name," he whispered, keeping his voice to a soft but rough and sort of 'growly' tone, "I'm Nick." I nodded and returned to look out the window.

Soon enough, we arrived at his apartment complex and took the elevator to his floor. It wasn't much of a fancy hotel, but I still couldn't get any better than him. He pulled me into his room and we sat on his bed. With an image of fun in his eyes, and a fearful regret in mine, I only hoped I could get through this night.

**

I walked out of the apartment remembering the man took me to downtown. I would love to live in downtown, or at least in a little house near it, where I could look through my second floor window and see the lights. But for now, I decided to just take a walk.

There was a cool breeze now since it had gotten much later and I couldn't help but just smile the slightest bit. I didn't know for what reason, but just for the Hell of it. I knew my life was bad enough, and nothing was going to get better so why not just be happy about one thing. That one thing was Joey, even though I swore to never love again, which is what I will do. But every time I thought about him, I thought about us, and everything that we can never be.

I decided to walk all the way home. It took me an hour or so but it was worth it to just clear my mind for a little bit. It had to be around 3AM by the time I had gotten to the front door of the little bakery. I was so tired that I couldn't keep my eyelids from falling for an extra second every time I blinked.

As I waddled lazily up the stairs, I saw a yellow post-it note on my dark green door. I assumed it was just from Paul, but as I got closer, my heart fluttered with the name I started to see on the paper. In large, loopy writing, it read:

"Bree,
We should talk again someday. I'll come by tomorrow. Think about it, okay?
Joey."

I slowly reached out to take the post-it note off my door. I'm not sure if it was because I was tired and delusional, or I was just head over heels in a forbidden love, but I read that note again countless times. I placed the note on my night table and went to bed that night with a smile on my face for the first time in a long time.

A/N I suck at updating.