Chasing the Night || a moey au

Chapter Fourteen

- Chapter Fourteen -

My feet turned, they turned like they always did, and Joey knew it, they turned to run. An attempt to escape. Some say that if you run far enough, you'll eventually forget every little thing that once had significance in your life, every valuable moment, every cherishing greeting, every wistful 'goodbye'. And that was my intention, to just run right through my entire life, not stopping for conflicts, relationships, bad ideas. It was failing, like a thousand year old stone building, it was crumbling to the ground. All because of this one man.

I felt someone grab my wrist, tenderly and firmly at the same time. Joey pressed his thumb into the crevasse of my wrist, where my veins pumped blood up and down my entire body, in and out of my aching heart. My fingers went limp with his touch and he swiftly twisted my wrist so my entire body would turn to face him. His hair was flat against his head, strands covered his bright eyes and dripped down the length of his nose before landing on his plump upper lip making the drop of rain appear a nude pink for a split second.

"Don't go." The world around me spun, making it beyond my ability to stare into Joey's eyes anymore. So I looked up. I watched the dark rain clouds languidly make their way across the late night sky, almost stood still if you didn't pay close attention. It reminded me of myself. My life stood still at this point, nowhere to scamper, no where hide from everything, no where to possibly go. I could just gradually fight my way through my never ending torment that I call life. There were not even stars up in that clouded sky, with all the air pollution in Los Angeles, you couldn't see those beautiful shining bulbs of light in every shape and size. Just like me, nothing beautiful to look at, nothing pleasurable to the sight, just a clouded shadow.

"Why?" I kept my eyes locked with the sky above.

"Because," he let out a slow breath. Why did we insist on standing out here in the pouring rain, in the middle of the night? "If you leave, I'll never get to know the Meghan I knew as a kid again. You'll just be another dull memory, in the back of my mind. I'll so eagerly reach out to uncover more of that memory, but it will just linger there like an obscurity that I can never fully see. I just want to talk, Meghan, like we did when we were kids. Remember that? I would never, and will continue to never hurt you. Ruining your life is not on my list of things to do to you, Meghan. Number One is just to get to know you, is that so hard?"

I shook my hand out of his grasp and shivers instantaneously ran down my spine and up my neck. "Yes. Yes it is. You are ruining my life. I know you don't understand why, or how I could be so absurd. But it's such a hard concept to explain. I planned to breeze through life, stopping at nothing, and no one in my way. I've tried relationships, I've even tried friendships, but for me, they just don't work. And the day I left, left my home, left my family, left you, I got on the first bus to Los Angeles, and I was prepared to proceed running uninterrupted for the rest of my life, if I had to. And then you showed up, again, and I've found myself drawn so closely to you that I cannot fathom leaving. But I have to, and it's ruining my goddamned life."

"You don't have t-"

"I have to, it's my only choice." I started running, my legs finally moved from their paralyzed state. Everything about him was beautifully tragic, I couldn't resist the atmosphere he gave off. He could make me smile with just the tips of his fingers in contact with my skin. He made my heart beat expeditiously, my lips curve upward, and my face just illuminate with the look in his mysterious eyes. My skin felt frigid under my soggy dress and I started shivering with every cool breeze that flew by. I picked up the end of my lilac dress and twisted it with both hands, watching it release all the water content the fabric held between several strands of thread. I dropped the dress and newly created crinkles appeared where I just pressed my hands.