Stardust Soul

12

The rest of the school trip was eventually postponed after the incident.

I immediately returned to Tokyo after the funeral. I don't want to look at everyone like this; I'm the one to blame for the death of Grandpa. If only we arrived earlier, then he shouldn't have suffered that fate!

Eventually, Tekuto arrived in my apartment a day after I came back. He told me that my mother asked him to come after me as they were getting worried, and that he's going to stay with me starting this day. He also started going to the same school as I. He tried to convince me to go to school and show myself, telling me that Jotaro and Ren are getting worried about me, but I still refused.

I spent my days indoors, mostly in my room; looking outside the window, throwing things that I could grab against the wall, and crying. I didn't leave my apartment for a whole week. I locked myself up in my room, avoiding contact with the outside world.

As I was curled up on my bed, crying, I heard a knock on the door.

"GO AWAY!" I shouted as I threw my pillow towards the door.

I covered my face with my blanket as I continued grieving, but another knock was heard on the door again. With tears rummaging through my eyes, I growled to the door, "I TOLD YOU TO GO AWAY! I DON'T WANT TO SEE ANYONE!"

The knocking still continued on.

I screamed as I threw everything I could grab to the door, "GET LOST! PLEASE!" I eventually knelt down on the door and wept silently. I still couldn't forgive myself.

Suddenly, I heard the doorknob turn and open. I didn't dare to look whoever it is, but I screamed again, "TEKUTO, OR WHOEVER YOU ARE, GO AWAY! I DON'T NEED HELP-"

"It's me," a familiar voice echoed.

Wiping my eyes, I turned around to see Jotaro standing in my room.

"Your room's a mess." He spoke as he slides away the rubble with his foot. My room is a huge mess as of now with books scattered everywhere, glass shards all over the floor from the plates and glasses I threw against the wall out of distress, and the things that used to be on my desk and the desk itself in chaos, like the aftermath of a hurricane.

"W-what are you doing h-here?" I asked, my voice still shaky from the crying.

He reached down to the floor, grabbing a picture frame, and sits down on the cleared floor.

I ended up staring at the picture frame he grabbed a little ago. It was a picture of me and Tekuto with grandfather, which was taken years ago back in Iga. I felt my eyes well up again, remembering grandfather's unfortunate fate.

I wanted to go berserk again like I did last night, but I couldn't since Jotaro's here. I didn't want to cry in front of him too, not like last time. All I could do was take hold of the nearest shard of glass and clutch it hard enough to hurt me. Jotaro then snatches my hand, making me let go of the glass fragment and revealing the fresh wound.

Jotaro looks at me in the eye with a solemn expression, "How long have you been hurting yourself?"

"It only happens when I break stuff," I faltered as I stared at my wound closing all by itself, "But then, it just heals. I don't know why."

I didn't realize that I was crying again until I felt my tears fall down on my cheeks. Feeling embarrassed, I made my way to my bed, lied down and covered myself with my blanket, "Don't look at me."

I felt Jotaro sitting down on the side of the bed, "I'll always look at you."

"Idiot," I grumbled, "This is why I don't want to see anyone; I look pathetic."

"No, you're not."

"Yes, I am."

"Want to talk about it?"

"No,"

"Everyone's worried about you. Your parents already called me since you don't answer any of their calls. Tekuto then called me afterwards, pleaded me to come and talk to you because you've been wrecking your room for 2 days now."

"Jotaro, just go... Please." I mumbled as I clutched my pillow tight, hoping to hear Jotaro's footsteps leave the room.

On second thought, I want him to stay... but I don't think I could take back what I just said.

Instead of leaving, he just lied down next to me, my back facing him. I felt his warm breath on my nape, making my heart race and the back of my hair stand on end.

He then spoke, "It's not your fault. I know that you tried to save your grandfather, but it had to happen."

"How is that going to help me feel better?!" I sat up from getting a little worked up.

"It can be said that humans live by destroying. In the midst of all that, taking a guess from your healing ability, your power is kinder than anything else." He continued talking calmly, "But once a life is taken... it doesn't come back."

"No matter the Stand, it can't bring it back..." his voice eventually tailed off as he slowly sat up with his back towards me. My attention turned to his hand, which reached something inside his pocket, slowly taking out a Polaroid photo.

It was the photo with his fallen comrades in it.

I just happened to realize that I'm not the only one who experienced someone close to me die. Jotaro has lost friends too – three of them, all at once. He may look like a stone-cold person, but I'm sure he has dealt with it as much as I did, inside his heart. My head ended up resting on his back as a sign of calming down.

"It may take some time, but you have to accept the fact that you're grandfather has to depart."

"I know," I sighed, "He's pretty old anyways. He should be resting."

But there's this feeling in my heart... this feeling that I couldn't let go, even if I accept my grandfather's death. This feeling that I couldn't let go until justice is given to grandfather, this feeling that refuses to fade until the murderer gets punished... Is this what they call the feeling of resentment? My grandfather didn't deserve to die like that; he could've died in a better way than being murdered!

"I get the feeling that there's something else in your mind right now," I laid back against the wall as Jotaro turned to face me, "What do you want to do?"

I wiped the last of my tears on my cheeks. The fire of passion suddenly lighted up inside my heart, desperate to find justice for my recently departed grandfather. I asked myself, is this a good decision to make? Am I going the right way? Will my grandfather be satisfied if I do this?

But I already made up my mind. I believe that this is destiny, that this has been my fate from the very start.

"I want... to avenge my grandfather." I proclaimed.