Black Boys Bloom Thorns First: Volume 1 (A Black Panther FanFic)

Black Boys Bloom Thorns First (Chapter 2)

Chapter 2

Passion burning, causing rapture of laughter
Pressure building, falling faster and faster
If I told you that you rock my world, I want you around me
Would you let me call you my girl, my girlfriend, my girlfriend?
I can give you the life you deserve, just say the word, baby
And I got you, darling, I got you

1500 or Nothin—"Girl"

October 5th, 20—

It is early morning, and I must write down my thoughts. I confess that I have not been consistent with writing in my journal as I had challenged myself to do while staying in this country. But there are so many distractions, (good ones!) that it is hard to sit still and just transcribe words onto paper.

I finally went to one of Bakari's BSU meetings a few days ago. I admit that it actually turned out to be a productive use of my time. I met some interesting people. However, I embarrassed myself in front of a woman who is a good friend of Bakari. Her name is Califia Stevens. Bakari has known this woman since he was ten. They grew up together. She is a dancer for the group he drums for. He says she's one of the best in the city.

I meet different women all the time, and I am usually very good at knowing where I stand with them, but Holy Bast, this woman, I feel like I'm wearing roller skates and trying to cross a road filled with marbles when I speak to her. I knew I was in trouble when I made the mistake of questioning why her father did not feed her while she was on a visit with him. She said he was in prison, and I swear to Sekmet, my face turned to stone. She noticed my kimoyo beads and then Andrea, the woman I am seeing now, rescued me from the quicksand of my ignorance.

I don't know why it bothers me so much, but I feel like I made a horrible first impression and I need to redeem myself to her. She is so different. Very direct with people. Fierce. She came into the meeting towards the end, and the moment she walked in the door, I felt like the energy in the room shifted. She is very striking to look at. Her skin is so brown, like the deep dark red-brown clay near Warrior Falls back home. And she has these dark freckles all over her nose and cheeks. I have never met a Black woman with hair the natural color of cinnamon. She reminds me so much of someone from back home, and I just can't remember who. She is both familiar and strange to me. Normally I would feel uneasy with people who keep me on edge, but there is something about her that intrigues me. She was fairly dismissive of me. The only time she took an interest was when she saw my beads.

I must make a note that she touched my hand to get a look at my beads, and she gave me a static electricity shock with her touch. I shall take that as a warning sign from Bast that Califia should be given a wide berth from me in the future. If I ever see her again. She and Bakari seem close, but he has never brought her around to the apartment like his other friends. She is very opinionated, and I must take a look at this book she came to the meeting to talk about. I have seen this writer Aarav on television. He seems pretty benign, but Califia was very heated about his message. I hear the term "anti-Black" being thrown around a lot. Aarav comes from immigrants and is Indian American, and I'm sure as a person of color himself, he must be aware of the problems Black Americans encounter at times. Califia called him a piece of shit. I don't know if this is a fair assessment of someone she doesn't know personally, but the BSU crowd didn't challenge her assertion. Andrea has a copy of the book and will loan it to me. I will read it this weekend.