He Appeared On My Notification Bar (Park Jimin x Reader)

Chapter 10 : Realization

[A/N]
Hello, my readers! I'll try to update daily from now since I'm having school holidays for 2 weeks straight! Thanks for always sticking by. 💖

School was always hell. It's been days since I've last spoke to Jimin and I knew that something was definitely wrong. Yes, he does sits beside me but we never talked to each other. Half of me felt bad for starting up an argument with him.

Or was I just heartbroken for the fact that he said he's just an ordinary seatmate with me hoping I would always be his personal tutor for him. He did mention we're friends but I felt terrible upon hearing those words.

It felt like he was using me.

I didn't grew feelings for him, did I?

Or did I actually did.

Maybe it was because I was selfish for myself, thinking about myself and the feelings I 'probably' have for Jimin that makes me start to dislike him. Maybe it was because of that, I make up excuses so that I could start avoiding him. And I realize my excuses were pure stupid and it visually seemed pointless.

He does wants to be friends with me, right?

I'm not just someone who constantly helps him with his homework, right?

I don't like starting up conflicts with people especially when I'll be graduating this year. I don't want to leave this precious school with bad memories. I don't want angst to follow me until I leave school. Should I apologize to him? I sighed in exasperation.

School has just ended and I was walking home instead of taking the bus. I didn't have any money with me today so I guess that explains it. Lost in thoughts, I was walking home with my mind that Jimin was invading.

As I was walking, I was near a playground and I saw the devil himself with his friend which I assume is Jungkook, based on how he looks. They looked like they were discussing about something important based on their expressions.

For God knows why, I hid behind a tree not knowing why would I bother to eavesdrop on them. It's not like it's my problem but I still went for it anyway. I carefully listened to what they have to say.

"My grades are so doomed this semester. Even my seatmate can't help me, she hates me. " said Jimin while brushing his hair backwards. Jungkook looked at him in pity. "I'm sorry I'm not much of a help too. I can't help myself either." said Jungkook while patting his hyung's back.

"What am I suppose to do? I need to pass. I need the grades in order to be qualified to get into the college I wish to enter next year." said Jimin while looking at Jungkook. "How about you ask your dad for help since you've got the money and he has a lot of acquaintances and influence. Your family has the power to get you anything you want, still. Talk to your dad."

"My parents don't even care about my academics and how I am doing in school. When I need funds for situations like these, I get help from my grandfather since he's my only solution and my personal hero." said Jimin. "So what seems to be the problem then? You're already good to go." said Jungkook.

"The thing is, of course I talked to my grandfather about college and what I want to do after high school ends and he asked me how I am doing in school. I told him my performances and he seems dissatisfied with how I'm doing. You see, he is a fair and square person. He'll only be willing to help me if I'm able to ace the national exams by the end of this year." explained Jimin.

"So you're saying you'll have to get good results in order for your grandfather to fund your studies and settle your college registry because your own parents wouldn't care. But isn't it a good thing that your parents don't care? They can just give you the money you need in order to fund your studies. Then you can settle everything yourself." said Jungkook.

"My parents want me to take over our company this year. My father is trying to make me the CEO of our family company that we own but I'm not buying it. That's why they don't care and I'll never be able to get into the college to study what I actually want." explained Jimin while burying his face in his hands.

"It's good that you'll be able to have your family assets under your name and etc but it's also good that you have your own dreams. What do you want to study?" asked Jungkook curiously.

Jimin looked at him with an emotionless face.

"Seriously, Kook? Do you even pay attention to me during lunch at our table? I always mention my interests and my future plans. I trust you guys the most yet you don't listen and now you're letting me down." he said and rolled his eyes.

"What?" said Jungkook while dropping his mouth open. "You can't be serious, hyung. That's going to be so hard. I thought you said it as a joke. It's going to be very, very competitive."

"I'm serious, Kook. I want to-"

I can't take this anymore. I feel really bad for him. He's so passionate in what he wants to do in the future and he's depending it all on me. If he doesn't get into the college that he wants, I'll feel miserable for not being there through his journey. I want to help him.

Without thinking twice, I barged into their conversation.

"Yah! Park Jimin!" I ran towards where they're at and their eyes widened at my presence.

"I'll help you. Sorry for being so paranoid earlier today." I don't know if this is actually what I'm supposed to do or is this a wrong move? I'm torn in between but all I have in mind is that I don't want to feel guilt. I have to help him.

"Min-Minji?!" said Jimin in shock. "Was she eavesdropping on us earlier?! " said Jungkook while pointing at me.

"I understand how you feel and I'm sorry for over thinking. I know you want to be friends with me and I know you are in desperate need of help to improve your grades." What am I doing?

I extended my hand for him to accept my apology.

He shook my hand and pulled me in for a hug. "Gomawo" he said, barely audible.

I honestly have no idea why am I even acting like this. At first, I hated him because I thought he wants to use me as his tutor and break our friendship after he finally gets what he wants from me. At least that was what I thought. I have to admit. I was paranoid. Or did I have such thoughts because I wanted to avoid him? Because of myself, I felt like I have feelings for him in which I have no idea why. Maybe I used that reason to avoid him. Either way, I felt miserable. Then I overheard Jimin and Jungkook's conversation, I immediately felt bad for my actions and thoughts from earlier. He's just someone who wants to achieve his dreams and he needs help from me. Even I don't have any plans for my own future.

But still, why me, Jimin? Perhaps.. No.. I'm just thinking too much.

Of course he asked me because it's easier for the both of us since we sit together during class and that we're... friends.

But Jimin, do you know what you're doing to me?