The End Of Forever

Who cares?

Who cares that I want to see my dad? So what? Nobody cares about what I want. Nobody cares about my dad. Nobody cares about me, or anything that has to do with me. What am I supposed to do with that? I've asked around. Nobody wants to see my dad. Maybe I could face tim him. Wait...it's not him anymore...it's her. I hate to miss gender her but it's hard for me to remember and to weird to me. How does she expect me to do this my myself? I could bring one of my friends who know him, but nobody knows her, nobody I know cares about her, because I don't even know myself. All I know is that I need to get over it and go visit her.

I ask Maverik if he wants to come with me and he does. He gets that I need the support and he knew him. He may not know her but he knew him and as long as that's true then he can get used to her instead of seeing him.

I tell River that I'm planing to go to San Diego to see her. She says it's a long drive for me to do by myself but I tell her that Maverik is coming with me. River says she is exited to see us and she gets that I want support from a friend in all the awkwardness. Maverik tells me he is exited to see my dad again even though he's a girl now.

From what I discovered Maverik is the only one who cares still, but that's ok. They will come around, my family is still hurting from everything and I get that, but someday they will have to get over it and spend some time with River. It hurts me that my 32 year-old mother is saying that she wasted her life on a guy who doesn't give a damn, that she says that the man that was my father and her husband is dead. I don't believe it. She has more than half her live to spend finding someone else, someone who will stay with her forever, if that's even possible. I don't believe in never ending marriage. I don't tell my mom that because then, neither will she. She will give up all together, never trying to start fresh or to try something new, she will be locked into her bubble of darkness and depression like I was two years ago, and still am in now.