Recovery

Deal with the devil

Eve.

And indeed the game was definitely on. I thought this was going to easy, but it wasn't in the slightest. No, I wasn't having trouble talking about my mom. I was having trouble fucking concentrating on Dr. Blacks questions. How could I? My mind kept thinking about straddling him in his chair, and riding him off into the sunset. God damn it Eve, stop it! You have a bet to win. I kept telling myself that, but after a quick glance at my handsome therapist, my dirty mind went right back into the gutter. I couldn't help it, I like sex, it obviously wasn't a secret. Just thinking about him on top of me had me squirming in my seat, which only made me want the real thing even more. Fuck!

"When was the last time you talked to her?" Dr. Black said, snapping me out of my inappropriate day dream.

"Wow, uh I guess when I was fourteen or, was it fifteen? Yup, I was fourteen. Shit, it's been that long? Huh, I guess time really does fly." I said, trying to hide my blushing face.

"That is quite a long period of time. Do you remember what your last conversation was about, Ms.Bright?" He said, intertwining his fingers together.

What I wanted to say was something like, the bitch cared more about herself than her own daughter. For a second, that was exactly what I was going to say, but after some consideration, I better not. Dr. Black would just stare at me, with his ice blue eyes and tell me I was being immature. So instead, I thought about how I could explain my last conversation with my mom, with the most maturity as possible. I'm not going to lie, I'm nervous as all hell. The only person I've talked to my mom about, was Destine. She was the only person that knew what she was like. She was there for me when I was left on my own at the young age of fourteen. Destine was the only person that saw my demons, but didn't run and hide. Now here I am, about to tell this perfect stranger everything. Would he run and hide, or would he look my demons in the eye like Des did?

"We only have twenty minutes left. Are you going back on our deal?" He coaxed.

"No I was just thinking. It's been a long time, I was just trying to remember." I adjusted myself in my seat and let out a shaken sigh.

"My mom, she was into some heavy shit. I was too young at the time to understand what was going on with her, but over time, it all made sense. She was a drug addict and only cared about her fix, I was just in the way. I was going to a friends house, so I went to my moms room to tell her goodbye. When I knocked on her door she didn't answer me. I only heard rustling and things being pushed around. I wanted to make sure she was okay, so I just walked in. Her room was filled with cigarette smoke, boxes and empty beer cans. She didn't even notice me, she was sitting on the floor, swaying side to side in the middle of her room, surrounded by boxes filled with her things. She couldn't open her eyes fully, she looked like a zombie. I asked her what was going on, and what was she doing packing all of her clothes. She fell over, just slumped her head into her lap. It scared the hell out of me, I started shaking her trying to wake her up and I was screaming mom, mom over and over. I ran to the bathroom and I filled up a bucket of water. I went back into her room and tossed the water on her face. After a few minutes of screaming and slapping her wet face, I was about to call the ambulance. I thought she was dead, I was so scared I couldn't even think straight. Right when I got up to get the phone, she sat up and gasped for air like she was drowning. I went to go help her up, thanking god she was okay, but she pushed me away. Can you believe that? I was trying to make sure she was okay and she pushes me away!"

At this point I had tears forming in my eyes, but I didn't know why. I was glad she was gone, and out of my life for good. I shook my head trying to get rid of my emotions.

"Anyways, I asked her what the hell her problem was, and why she was packing up her room. She just looked at me, gritting her teeth, like I was the last person she wanted to see. She started packing her things again, like she wasn't just passed out a minute ago. The first thing she had to say for herself, after what she just put me through was mind blowing.