Children of Lust or Love

Chapter 2: A New Beginning and End of My Past.

Dad ripped my pants off and pulled off my shirt. I was scared and he had his hand over my mouth. He took out ducktape and put some over my mouth and said that if I touched it he was going to hit me. I should have taken it over, but I didnt. I sat on my bed and dad was taking his clothes off, he left his boxers on and it was creeping me out.

"Come over here, Eddy." he said as I got up and went over.

He pushed me to my knees and I didnt know what he was going to make me do until this.

"I want you to be a good little boy, you understand me?" he asked and I shook my head yes.

Mom was searching for me and dad. She busted in my door to find me on my knees and dad trying to put his penis in my mouth. Dad took the tape off and he heard the door open. He turned around and mom pulled her pistol out of her purse. Bang! One blow to the head. Where I live at you could shoot guns all day and no one will hear hear you.. I guess this was a set up..?

Mom came over and got me. She placed me down stairs in front of the tv and told me to stay there and dont look back at her. Mom cleaned up the mess in my room and now it looks as if nothing ever happened.

Six years later..

I came home from school and got on the computer. Logged in to MySpace like I always do and found a message in my inbox. My friend, Jamie, he sent me a link to a website for chatting so me and him could talk like texting. Its called Chat Now Live. I clicked on the link and thought nothing of it. I felt safe and thought 'okay if Jamie sent this, it was okay.' I started searching for Jamie, but I got nothing but creeps and perverts. Until I found Jenny, a 16 year old girl who was in Florida. She was nice and sweet. I found a picture of her on MySpace. I added her on there. Her and I started talking almost everyday. Then, on October 11th of 1997 I got a message from her saying that she couldnt talk to me anymore. She never told me why. She left and deleted her account before I could send the message fast enough. She just turned 14 about a week or so ago. Why did she have to go? I blamed myself for the longest time.

"Eddy, time for dinner. Its your favorite. Spaghetti."

"Okay, mom. Im coming."

I went downstairs and sat the table for dinner. I placed out the plates, placemates, silverwear, and cups. Mom placed the food and drink down and the phone rang.

"Hang on, mom. I'll get the phone. I wont be long." I said and smiled.

I picked up the phone.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Hello, this is Jenny Marshall. Is Eddy Malcolm there?"

I dropped the phone and my jaw dropped. Mom couldnt hear, but I eyes got wide.

"Hello?..Hello?" she kept asking.

I picked the phone back up.

"Yes he is.. You're talking to him." I started to tear up.

"Hi, Eddy. I wanted to tell you that the reason I had to go was, is because Im moving from Tampa to Miami and won't have internet connection. Im sorry I had to leave so fast. I dont know if we will ever meet, but I want to tell you my new address and hope to get letter from you and pictures." she said and I knew from the tone in her voice she was smiling.

I wrote down the address and hung up the phone. I went back to the dining room and had dinner with mom.

"Honey, who was that?"

"It was Jamie. Just telling me about a video game that just came out."

"Oh. Okay. Well let have dinner then, huh?" she said and smiled.

I went to bed that night thinking of a way to get to her. I didnt know what had came over me, but she was all I could think about. I dreamt about her, saw her every which way I turned, and could hear her voice when Im alone or in a crowd. I dont know if this is an obession or am I just plain flat out crazy.

The next day at school,

"Hey Jamie. I have a question, bro."

"Sure, man. Whats up?"

"Remember the girl I told you about Jenny?"

"What about her? Oh god, shes a 80 some year old slut, isn't she?"

"No!! Shes my age. Shes 16 just like us. What I was going to say was that, she called me last night, gave me her address and said she hopes to hear from me soon. Thats not all. Ive been seeing her, hearing her, and feeling her. I dont know how or why I feel like this. What does it mean?"

"Man, it sounds to me like you are in love."

"WHAT?! I cant be in love. Its impossible. Im only 16 years old. Theres no way...is there?"

"You could be. You never know unless you find out yourself."

I didnt know at first what he meant. As I was laying in bed, thinking about Jenny. About her hair, her eyes, what she smelt like, and what she..felt like. I shook my head from those thoughts. I dont love her. I dont love her. I kept thinking to myself.

"I dont love her. I dont love her. I dont love her." I told myself.

Or do I?